


For You, I Would Ruin Myself

by taeyongsan



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Discussion of Abortion, Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Minor Injuries, Minor Violence, Mpreg, Past Character Death, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, mention of miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:26:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27426430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taeyongsan/pseuds/taeyongsan
Summary: Mark was beautiful but he was forbidden. Doyoung knew that. But he was already damned and he could never really resist temptation all that well.
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Mark Lee
Comments: 14
Kudos: 96
Collections: A/B/O NCT Round 1





	For You, I Would Ruin Myself

**Author's Note:**

> For ABO NCT.
> 
> #A/B/O106 Prince Doyoung is an alpha wanted by many, but he falls in love with the prisoner that they took in from their enemy nation, Mark, the beautiful omega. Many problems arise as he falls in love with the one person he isn’t supposed to fall in love with, and after a drunken night, he finds out he had made an heir with his prisoner.
> 
> To the prompter, thank you for such a lovely prompt. I tried my best. I don’t think this qualifies as real angst or real enemies-to-lovers at all, so I apologize I couldn’t incorporate that better into the fic. Originally, this was going to be much longer and have a lot more background story but I ended up cutting a lot of that out and only kept the most important parts at the last minute since I was already pushing it. I wish I could’ve given you a better fic T___T
> 
> To the mod, thank you for holding this fest and being so understanding and patient with me. Thank you for your hard work and I’m sorry for all the extensions I asked for at the last minute T__T
> 
> To everyone else, I hope you enjoy at least part of this. Thank you.
> 
> The fic title was taken from Taylor Swift’s “illicit affairs”.

They arrived in the middle of the night, dragging their legs along the wide path, the heavy chains and clasps around their wrists and ankles clanking against each other loudly as they moved. It was a slow event and not very noteworthy. At least not noteworthy enough for someone to have woken Doyoung up purposefully.

There were about eighty of them if Doyoung had to make an estimate. Mostly omegas and betas, he could say, just from appearance alone. He was sure if he were outside, he’d be able to properly tell, take in the various scents mixing.

There were guards on horses flanking the rear end and some more along the sides, shepherding the group somewhere else Doyoung couldn’t see. Most likely the holding cells kept deep within the surrounding forest behind the palace.

Doyoung watched from a window of the library, careful not to let anyone see him peering out. It was well past the time he had retired for bed and if he was caught, he’d surely be reprimanded. But he was too curious. He’d woken to the sound of the chains rattling and deep voices calling out commands. The air around the palace was typically quiet and the nights undisturbed, so to hear a sudden commotion outside was a break in routine.

The noise died down as the group moved further away, the orders of the guards and the horses' hooves against the gravel fading away with the clanking of chains. Doyoung continued to look outside the window even when the last guard had disappeared. His gaze moved up to the sky, finding the moon, full and large amongst glittering stars. It was already on its way down, letting him know that a few hours from now, the sun would be rising from another part of the sky. 

With a sigh, he finally pushed himself away from the window, the sleeves of his robe falling over his hands with a small flourish. He quietly stepped through the library, mindful of where he knew the floorboards creaked.

Taeyong’s room was not far off from the library and over the years, Doyoung knew he had developed light sleeping habits, always alerted and too attuned to the sounds around him. Doyoung had been caught sneaking through the palace one too many times by Taeyong. But not tonight.

Doyoung made it back to his room minutes later, quietly closing his door and leaning back against it, releasing a deep breath he didn’t know he had been holding in. For a moment, he allowed himself to wonder what would happen to the people in the holding cells. It wasn’t for him to decide and there was no telling what his mother would do. She could be unpredictable sometimes, throwing Doyoung off right when he both thought he figured her out.

“It’s all a part of the mystery,” she told him and his brother once, her face hidden underneath the shade of her parasol. She was a bit dramatic, always moving with slight exaggeration to her movements. A flourish here, a long tense pause there. This had been no different. She’d waited, a teasing smile on her face.

“What mystery?” Doyoung had finally asked her. He’d always been an impatient child.

As she turned to look down at him and his brother, the sun kissing her face and revealing deep brown eyes, a million secrets hidden within them. Mother was beautiful, Doyoung had always known that. Even now, years later, she looked youthful. Pale skin with the prettiest pink rogue dusted across her cheeks, her long eyelashes fluttering and her lips parted as she waited to answer.

“Well, that’s for you to find out, isn’t it?”

It hadn’t been for him to find out. For years, Doyoung had known that he would never find out because he would never be like his mother. But she hadn’t been looking at him when she had answered. She had been looking at his brother. It was for _him_ to find out.

Donghyun was prepared just like their mother had been, always taken care of to ensure perfection. He could be nothing less of perfect if he planned on doing well in his life. Endlessly learning and memorizing everything there was about their lands, holding onto that knowledge so that one day, he could rule just like Mother and the rest of their ancestors had once before.

And maybe it had hurt Doyoung, to see all that attention go to his brother but he learned and grew up from throwing petty tantrums, moving on to bettering himself. And it had come in handy.

What would Donghyun have done? Doyoung asked himself. It was hard to tell. Donghyun had been a calmer person but he’d been just as mysterious as Mother. There had been tricks up his sleeve that he never got to reveal, that he never got to teach Doyoung. It was hard to tell how Donghyun’s mind worked, and though Doyoung could ask the people Donghyun left behind, he was sure they wouldn’t be able to answer him the way Donghyun would have.

Finally pushing himself off the door, he moved into the closed-off area that held his bed. Taking off his robe and leaving his slippers beside the bed, he got on, burying himself underneath the thick blankets.

It was still hard for Doyoung.

It’d been nearly two years now. Most days, he was able to push aside the ache within his chest. Taeyong kept Doyoung busy at his request. If there was anything Doyoung could do, he asked Taeyong to put it in his schedule. Distracting himself with mindless reading and uninteresting meetings kept his mind at ease, the pain at bay.

The nights where he was alone were harder. It allowed the fears to come creeping out from the shadows, haunting him like the nightmares he used to have as a child. But he could not call out for Mother as he had then. It hurt her just as much.

He knew Mother had planned something for the upcoming anniversary but Doyoung would give his brother a visit before then, to allow them some time together. He’d ask Taeyong to clear part of his schedule and prepare flowers. Maybe he’d be able to take Haeun with him.

Doyoung peeked out from underneath the blankets, watching the white light spill in through the sheer curtains that hung in front of the large windows all along the wall, the grilles casting elongated shadows over the wooden boards. He slowly fell asleep staring at the pale pools of light, carefully moving across the floor as the moon began to disappear, his eyes closing and familiar darkness enveloping him.

When he awoke, Taeyong was beside his bed and he was poking his cheek. “Your Highness,” he said gently, “Breakfast is nearly ready.”

Doyoung blinked and sat up a little, leaning back against his elbow, using his other hand to rub at his eyes. The soft, golden sunlight streamed in through the windows where the moonlight had come in earlier. He couldn’t have slept more than four hours. It looked like the sun had only just risen from over the horizon.

“Doyoung?” He turned his attention back to Taeyong. He looked a bit worried with the subtle pout on his face and the slight furrow of his eyebrows. And his scent gave him away as well, just a bit overwhelming. Carefully, Taeyong raised a hand to press against his forehead. “Are you feeling ill?”

“No, I’m all right,” Doyoung answered, clearing his throat. He took Taeyong’s wrist and tugged his hand away. His response did little to smooth the concern on Taeyong’s face. “Good morning.”

Taeyong pulled his wrist from Doyoung’s hold, huffing. “You stayed up?” Before Doyoung could ask, a bony finger was pointed at his face. “I can see the darkness underneath your eyes. You’ve hardly slept. Am I right?”

There was little point in fighting Taeyong, especially this early in the morning. “Correct,” he answered, pushing himself up into a proper sitting position. He smoothed the blankets over his thighs. “There was a slight commotion in the middle of the night”

The way Taeyong’s face blanched told Doyoung that he knew. “I heard nothing,” Taeyong said anyway. He wasn’t good at hiding anything. 

“I know that you know,” Doyoung said, turning his attention down to the blankets. They were embroidered with golden thread, an intricate pattern that he traced with his finger for a second. He stopped and raised his head enough to meet Taeyong’s eyes. “Care to tell me?”

“Her Majesty has asked for your presence at a briefing regarding an issue within the Hado region.”

Hado. Doyoung looked away the moment Taeyong said the words. There was a sudden tenseness in the air and it swallowed the rest of Taeyong’s words. That was… Donghyun had…

“Very well,” Doyoung finally said. He clapped his hands together. Taeyong stepped back from the bed and Doyoung scooted to the edge, dropping his legs over the edge. He got off the bed, stepping into his slippers. “I’m awake. Let’s prepare for the day.”

“Will you be joining the briefing, Your Highness?”

The shift in Taeyong’s tone was obvious. In the years Taeyong and Doyoung had known each other, Taeyong had learned well when to put the distance between them. As much as they teased and poked fun at each other, they were professional. Doyoung was the crown prince after all.

“No,” Doyoung answered. He turned his back to Taeyong and began to walk into the washroom attached to his bedroom. Doyoung didn’t look back as he gave his next instructions. “I won’t be joining Her Majesty. Send my apologies. I’m visiting my brother today.”

“Your High—”

Doyoung paused at the threshold, gripping himself mentally as he faced Taeyong again. “Invite them. And prepare flowers.”

“Understood.”

Taeyong left quietly, closing the doors. 

With a heavy sigh, Doyoung pushed the thoughts away and stepped into the washroom, ready to wash off this feeling.

* * *

It was a bit warm for a February day. Still, Doyoung was dressed in his coat. It was thinner than usual but thick enough that he wouldn’t get cold after a while. He had ditched the gloves despite Taeyong’s complaints. At Doyoung’s request, Taeyong stayed back, watching from a distance. Doyoung wouldn’t be able to handle Taeyong today. It was for the best.

“Taeyong is rather insistent, isn’t he?”

Doyoung looked at his companion. For her age, Eunjoo looked worn down. She was older than Doyoung but still at a very prime time in her life. When she smiled, there was a heaviness to it and the feeling never reached her eyes. She became tired more easily and had to rest for long periods. The toll of losing Donghyun had weighed down on her heavily.

“He is,” Doyoung answered, offering her a smile. Her hold on his arm tightened a little and they stopped, allowing her to gather herself. “We can sit for a moment if you want to.”

Her smile was forced and a bit pained. “I’m all right,” she replied. “He’s only up ahead.”

Doyoung looked in front of them. The dirt path they walked on led straight through the large grassy patch, right into the forest but other smaller paths branched off the main one, leading to rows of tall, dirty headstones.

Donghyun had been buried amongst all of these other people that were related to Doyoung in one way or another but he’d never really known them. Most of them had died long before Doyoung had entered the world. Only familiar names and familiar stories surrounded him but none of them as personal as Donghyun.

It took a few more minutes but they did find Donghyun. The groundskeepers kept the headstones clean. Eunjoo let go of Doyoung and dropped onto her knees beside it, her hands delicately brushing across his name. Doyoung placed the bouquet near the headstone. Donghyun hadn’t been a fan of flowers but Doyoung knew that somewhere, Donghyun was thankful for the gesture.

 _Oh, Mother of Fire_ , Doyoung thought as he looked up into the sky, _please take care of my brother_. Doyoung wasn’t religious but after Donghyun died, he found himself asking The Mother for her protection. A crisis of faith was what Eunjoo had said it was. Doyoung still felt a bit disconnected to it as he’d always gone along with the practices a bit half-heartedly but there was more basis to it now. _Oh, Mother of Fire, take pity on us sinners._

“I’ll leave you alone for a moment,” Doyoung said, stepping away.

Eunjoo didn’t look back at him but she nodded, finding a comfortable sitting position by the headstone. Her dress would wrinkle and get dirty but she had never cared. When she began to talk in hushed tones, Doyoung walked away, only looking back to see her melancholic expression.

Even as he got further, he could sense her sadness. It was almost unbearable to handle. Doyoung remembered the day they found out Donghyun had died. The pheromones that Mother and Eunjoo had given off were so powerful. Despite the months that had passed, those pheromones remained, always lingering and reminding them of a missing piece in their life. Even Doyoung had them.

And it helped. Coming to visit Donghyun helped. The first winter was difficult. The snow hardly allowed them to make the walk but Mother had been insistent that the groundskeepers have a path cleared to Donghyun. Doyoung couldn’t stay out too long during those days, feeling his fingers begin to freeze and the sadness weighing down on his body. This past winter had been better but not any less heavy.

“Things don’t stay gloomy for long,” Donghyun had said once.

He was a good brother. Doyoung had learned many things from him, directly and indirectly. Donghyun had been the one who taught Doyoung how to properly hold a weapon, showed him how to use it, and told him how to read others. Stay cautious and stay quiet. Always, _always_ be prepared.

There was no preparation for Donghyun’s death. But at least he passed doing something he’d felt so passionate about.

Doyoung paused, taken out of his thoughts by a sound nearby. He turned in a circle. The grounds were filled with different flower bushes and shrubs, crowding around the trunks of trees. It was easy to hide within them but hard to get out. Doyoung had learned that as a child.

He heard the sound again, to his left. “Who goes there?” he asked.

There was no response. Doyoung almost thought he heard nothing but then he caught it. A scent so sweet and pure, unlike anything he’d ever smelled before, coming from the shrubs. Carefully, Doyoung approached, reaching out to push aside the thin branches. It couldn’t be the flowers, he thought, because this was different. It was like vanilla and chamomile with something citrusy to it as well.

“Hello?” Doyoung pushed away more branches but quickly jumped back, bringing his hand to his chest when one of the thorns poked him. He quickly looked at his palm, finding a small dot of blood. With a huff, he looked back at the greenery. “Whoever you are, come out now.”

Doyoung didn’t like to use his position to get what he wanted but surely, this person knew who he was. Everyone did.

There was no response and Doyoung tried again, reaching out and pushing the branches aside. Pushing through the stinging against his palms as more thorns pricked at his skin, he finally found something. Someone.

“Oh,” he said under his breath. He inhaled deeply and retreated once again once he registered what was happening, what he saw disappearing underneath green leaves and pink flowers. “Oh, no.”

This person was curled up in pain. They’d been clutching their abdomen, their face twisted into an expression of agony. Their scent was so strong for a reason, Doyoung thought. It was dizzying, intoxicating. Doyoung had only gotten one breath of it and he felt his heart pound hard, his hands beginning to shake. But Doyoung was in control.

He’d been taught it since he was a child. Doyoung had been kept away to learn these lessons. This had been the only thing Donghyun never taught him. Donghyun could’ve never taught him to have this much control.

Stumbling back onto the path, Doyoung began to cough. He needed to leave. He needed to get out but he couldn’t leave that person behind. If someone else found them, Doyoung wouldn’t be able to protect them or help them. It was his job to ensure the safety of anyone on these grounds.

There was a loud whine from the shrubs and Doyoung nearly fell onto his knees. He could feel himself getting more desperate. Swallowing hard and gathering his courage, Doyoung walked around, trying to find a better way to reach the person. If he went to find a groundskeeper to cut the area away, it could take some time, and if there were more people involved, the more dangerous it could become.

“Help…” Doyoung heard. It was a gentle voice but it was also deep. His vision hadn’t failed him, he thought. “Help.”

“I’m coming,” Doyoung called out. He paused and looked at his options. Eunjoo could go find someone but bringing her into this would stress her out. If he could just get to them…

There was a small opening but it looked large enough to fit a small child. Doyoung wouldn’t fit and if he forced himself, he wouldn’t be coming out clean. Was there any other option?

 _Oh, Mother of Fire, how you curse me_ , Doyoung thought, looking up at the sky once again. 

Doyoung crouched near the small opening. He’d barely fit, he decided. But if he could get through… The area around the base of the tree trunk was fairly free of bramble, giving him maybe a meter and a half to work with. Just enough. It had to be enough.

Getting through was hard. Doyoung kept his head down as best as he could, pushing away the branches in front of him. It was only about a meter of bush to get through. He repeated it over and over in his head, ignoring the way thorns poked into his upper arms and palms.

When he reached the ending of the opening, he fell forward, his injured hands catching him. The soil beneath his palms was moist and like this, he could smell the earthiness of it. But there was something even stronger that overpowered it.

“You…” Doyoung crawled towards the person, turning them onto their back. A low groan escaped past their cracked lips. Doyoung tried to hold his breath, hands shaking as he pushed back the hair on their face. But he exhaled as he saw their face. “Oh, no.”

Who…

Whoever this was, was not well. Their face had no color to it but the rise and fall of their chest and the gentle sighs every other moment told Doyoung they were alive at least. Doyoung pressed the ends of his fingers to their cheekbone. They were cold to the touch.

Doyoung pulled his hand back and took off his coat. The air was chilly, taking him by surprise, but he didn’t know how long this person had been here. He draped it over their body and it helped mask their strong scent. What a relief, Doyoung thought.

But he now needed to get them out and find the doctor immediately. How this person had gotten here without anyone noticing, Doyoung wasn’t sure, but he had a responsibility to correct it now.

He stood and could just barely see above the top of the shrubs. He spotted Eunjoo walking down the path, clearly looking for him. He raised his arm and waved.

“Eunjoo!”

Surprised, she looked up, turning in a circle before she spotted Doyoung. She gathered her dress and rushed over. Doyoung noticed how the dirt and grass had stained the pale yellow fabric. Wiping her hands on her skirt, she tried to push aside the branches as Doyoung had earlier.

“Eunjoo, wait,” he said. He couldn’t see her anymore but he could hear her stop moving. “Find the head groundskeeper. And call for the family doctor. It _has_ to be him.”

He looked down at the person, feeling pitiful. He’d found them at least and could make sure they were taken care of properly. Whatever their position on the grounds was, Doyoung would ensure they were compensated greatly.

Donghyun could wait a little longer for Doyoung to visit.

* * *

Doyoung was not allowed into the room so he waited outside. It was hard to sit still so he took to pacing the long hall. The maids that passed him by stopped and bowed, and he offered them half-hearted nods of acknowledgment.

After the groundskeeper came and managed to cut away enough of the bramble to let Doyoung through, Eunjoo had been taken away by her lady-in-waiting. She’d always been more alert and attentive but as Doyoung came out carrying the stranger, she had very quickly realized the situation. She was like Doyoung after all. 

Doyoung had set the stranger in the grass, wrapping his coat around them tighter. They were still breathing and they made sounds to acknowledge Doyoung’s questions. The groundskeeper waited with Doyoung, unaffected by the scent around them, and when it was time, the groundskeeper helped Doyoung take the person inside.

The doctor looked a bit upset that he’d been called to treat someone that wasn’t a member of the family but Doyoung had insisted, telling him he’d be rewarded greatly. And that was when Doyoung had been locked out of the room, only the doctor and one of his students inside with the stranger.

It’d be an hour. No, more than that…

The more time passed, the more in his right mind he felt. First, he began to feel the stinging from the scrapes and cuts on his palm. Then his legs began to ache from crouching beside the stranger for so long. As his mind cleared, he began to feel tired.

He closed his hand into a fist, biting down on his bottom lip as the pain registered, and then unfurled it, only to repeat the process. He wasn’t bleeding but it did hurt. It was enough to keep his mind focused on something but the person locked inside the room.

There hadn’t been any noise. Even when Doyoung had tried to listen, he had heard nothing but the doctor’s muffled speaking. Could it be that this person was dying?

Doyoung found himself once again looking up towards the sky but he was not met with the blue and the sun. The ceilings inside were painted with depictions of the people they worshipped. He found the person he was looking for. She was powerful and almighty, standing tall in a red flowing dress, her arms open wide and welcoming.

“Oh, Mother of Fire,” he mumbled, “Let them be saved.”

And so Doyoung waited. It wasn’t long before Taeyong found him. Doyoung had briefly told him the situation earlier as they rushed inside, asking him to cancel any plans he had for the rest of the day, and Taeyong had no choice but to agree. It didn’t mean he was spared the lecture.

“Do you want to know how infuriated Her Majesty is with me?” Taeyong crossed his arms across his chest. He shook his head, stopping Doyoung from quipping back. This was no time to poke fun at Taeyong. “Her Majesty has requested your presence immediately.”

“But the—”

“Immediately,” Taeyong repeated. His gaze dropped down to study Doyoung and he reached out to grabbed Doyoung’s fist, looking over his palm. “Or after you get cleaned up. Mother of Fire, Doyoung, the doctor hasn’t treated these? What in the world is he doing then?”

When Taeyong began to turn, Doyoung wrapped his fingers around his forearm. It hurt much more than he anticipated but he gritted his teeth. “If you go in there, you’ll regret it. Just leave it, Taeyong. I’ll wash up and go wherever Mother needs me.” Taeyong looked back at him with narrowed eyes, unconvinced. “Trust me.”

Taeyong didn’t continue and Doyoung let him go. “Fair enough.” A look of concern crossed his face as he looked over Doyoung again. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

They walked up to Doyoung’s room, where Taeyong asked the maids around to prepare a bath for him. He also asked one for several things and Doyoung could tell she was a bit overwhelmed by his list, and as she left, he wondered if she could remember half of what Taeyong wanted.

She returned with a large tray, all the items laid out across the silver metal nicely, and placed them on the low table in the center of the room. Doyoung was sitting on the sofa, watching as Taeyong and the young woman looked through the things, quiet words exchanged between them. Taeyong looked the least bit pleased when she bowed to them and left.

“This will have to do,” he said with a sigh, taking a seat beside Doyoung. Taeyong took his wrist and Doyoung opened his palm, seeing the extent of the damage himself. The cuts and scrapes weren’t the worst but still a bit unsightly. Taeyong pressed a damp handkerchief over his palm, gently wiping after a few seconds. “How lovely, tsk.”

“I didn’t know you knew how to do this,” Doyoung said.

Taeyong was quiet, only cleaning away the dirt and whatever else was on Doyoung’s palm. Doyoung nearly thought he wasn’t going to answer. “Not all of us get battle training,” Taeyong murmured. He set aside the handkerchief, reaching over for another one and a small bottle. Doyoung watched as he uncapped the bottle, putting a few drops onto the new handkerchief. He offered his hand to Taeyong again, letting him continue to clean his palm. “All of us know how to do things like this, just so you’re aware.”

“All of you?”

Doyoung thought about his brother. So… “I didn’t know that.”

“Well, you’ve never been prone to injuring yourself,” Taeyong said. He clicked his tongue. “Or at least until now. What did you even do?”

“That person…” Doyoung paused and thought about them again, wondering if the doctor was finished. Taeyong stopped and looked up at him, waiting. “They were hurt and stuck. I’m not sure how they got there but I couldn’t just leave them there.”

“And you couldn’t have called someone else instead of going in there yourself?”

Doyoung frowned. “Taeyong,” he said, leaning in and lowering his voice, “They were _in heat_. If I called anyone else, the situation would’ve been worse.”

“What?” Taeyong’s expression turned into one of worry, the corners of his lips turning down and his eyebrows furrowing. And then Taeyong had let go of his wrist and was feeling his forehead and cheeks, his neck, trying to “Doyoung… Doyoung, are you all right?”

Doyoung took Taeyong’s wrist and pried his hands away from his body. “I’m fine,” he said. Taeyong looked unconvinced. “I swear it, Taeyong. I—”

“Whatever happens to that person, you’re not allowed to see them. Doyoung, you know how dangerous that is.” Taeyong pulled his wrists out of Doyoung’s grip and stood, wiping his hands on his jacket. “Someone will finish cleaning your wounds. If you’ll excuse me, I have to find Her Majesty.”

Doyoung watched Taeyong leave. Once the door closed, he waited. He hated going against Taeyong’s requests but he would bear the disappointed looks and lecture. He just needed to know one thing.

He let another minute pass before he got up and left his room.

Avoiding maids and footmen was easy. Donghyun had taught him how to sneak past them. He’d always been better at it but Doyoung had been practicing these days. He managed to make it to the second floor, where the stranger was.

He hovered outside the door for a moment, wondering if it would be okay for him to go in. As he was about to push the door open, it was pulled by someone inside. Doyoung stepped back, moving to the side. The doctor stepped out and behind him, his assistant.

“Ah, Your Highness,” the doctor said. He was an older man and Doyoung had known him for as long as he could remember. “You waited.”

“Of course, Doctor.” Doyoung held his hands behind his back, bowing his head and offering the same to the younger assistant. He met the doctor’s gaze again. “And how are they?”

“We managed to ease the heat for the meantime,” he replied. His expression was serious. “It was only just starting so it was fairly simple but he will need frequent check-ups and monitoring during his next heat.”

“They’re all right?”

“For right now.” The doctor cleared his throat and stepped aside. “Jungwoo here will explain everything else.”

“Of course. Thank you, Doctor.” Doyoung reached out to take one of the doctor’s hands in his, bowing his head for a long moment. When he straightened up, the doctor looked a bit concerned. “If you see Taeyong, he’ll pay you for your time and experience.”

The doctor nodded in thanks. He looked at his assistant one last time. “Jungwoo, his hands,” he said. When he looked at Doyoung, he smiled and bowed his head. “Your Highness.”

The doctor left Doyoung behind with his assistant. Jungwoo hadn’t been around for long. He was younger than Doyoung by some years and it wasn’t until Jungwoo had reached a certain age that he began accompanying the doctor on visits to the palace. There was a playfulness with Jungwoo but also a sense of professionalism.

“Doyoung-hyung,” Jungwoo started, taking his wrists and inspecting his palms. There it was. “Ah, so it is true.”

“What’s true?” Doyoung asked.

“The maids that were in and out said you had saved him, the person inside.” Jungwoo let go of Doyoung’s wrists. “Seems they were telling the truth. Let me clean you up and tell you what I know.”

Jungwoo stepped back into the room and Doyoung carefully followed. The large room was separated into two like all other rooms in the palace and the doors that lead to the bedroom were closed. The sitting room smelled sweet but not the same as it had earlier.

“It’s only a pain reliever,” Jungwoo as he sat down. Like in Doyoung’s room, there was a tray with several items laid out. Jungwoo patted the spot beside him and Doyoung sat. “It shouldn’t affect you much so don’t worry about breathing it in.”

Doyoung offered his hands to Jungwoo, letting him do what he needed to. “Are they—” He cleared his throat. “Is he okay?”

“Physically, yes,” Jungwoo said and then he hummed as if he were thinking. Doyoung waited. “You know that dramatic changes will affect the mind. It’s best if he doesn’t work. What does he do here on the grounds?”

“I don’t know,” Doyoung answered honestly. Jungwoo wasn’t judgemental. “There are hundreds of people that work on the grounds. I don’t know who… where he came from.”

“In any case, he should stay away from working.” Jungwoo paused to wrap a clean bandage around Doyoung’s palm, fastening it with a small clip. He took Doyoung’s other hand and began to repeat the process. “It’s a vulnerable time. Even if Doctor Jung managed to curb the heat symptoms, his body is still going through it.”

“So he is still going through his heat?”

Jungwoo nodded. “There’s no stopping it once it’s begun but it’s easier to control the symptoms at the start. If he were to…” A pause. Doyoung could fill in the blanks. Jungwoo sighed. “It wouldn’t make it any less of a possibility.”

“I can—”

“I don’t think you should, Doyoung-hyung,” Jungwoo murmured. “I know you’re more capable than others like you but it’s still dangerous. If possible, you should avoid seeing him again.”

“Taeyong said that earlier,” Doyoung said.

“Does Taeyong-hyung know you’re here?” Jungwoo asked, peering at Doyoung through his long eyelashes. “Or should I avoid the topic?”

“Avoid the topic.” Doyoung shifted in his spot. “So tell me why.”

“Why?”

“Why shouldn’t I see him again?”

Jungwoo didn’t answer right away. “It’s complicated.” He took a new bandage and began to wrap it around Doyoung’s hand. “So just don’t do it, Doyoung-hyung, for your own safety.”

“He’s not going to hurt me, is he?”

“No, but…”

Doyoung pulled his hand back before Jungwoo could fasten the bandage, making him sigh in frustration. “You’re not saying you think I would hurt him, right?”

“You’re the last person who would hurt someone,” Jungwoo murmured, tugging Doyoung’s wrist back and tightening the bandage around it again. “But with someone like that… Doyoung-hyung, I’ve accompanied Doctor Jung on many cases like this but… this one is different. I’ve never seen someone like him.”

“Jungwoo,” Doyoung tried.

“If you truly want to see him, I suppose no one will be able to stop you. But give it some time, Doyoung. Three days. Doctor Jung and I will return then.” Jungwoo held Doyoung’s hand in between both of his. Doyoung met Jungwoo’s gaze, seeing the genuine concern in them. “For both of your sakes, just wait, if you must see him.”

Jungwoo explained a bit more about certain pain relievers and care instructions but Doyoung couldn’t follow. Thankfully, Doctor Jung had explained much of this to the people who would look over the stranger for the next few days. Jungwoo excused himself, bowing his head at Doyoung and stepping out.

Doyoung looked at his hands wrapped in bandages. He could wiggle his fingers and close his hands into fists with only a bit of pain. Jungwoo had left the door that led into the hall open and Doyoung looked toward it before looking to the closed door that led into the bedroom.

After a moment’s hesitation, Doyoung approached the closed door. He pushed it open and the sweet smell of the pain relief medicine clouded his senses. It was overwhelming and he brought a bandaged hand up to cover his nose and mouth for a moment until he got used to it.

The stranger was on the bed, sleeping. As Doyoung got closer, he saw how his face was twisted into one of pain. Even in his sleep, it was painful. From what Jungwoo explained, there had been some trauma to his body and it seemed like this was his first heat, which made little sense given how old the stranger looked. Up close, Doyoung could see that he was probably a few years younger. There was a sharpness to his jaw and Doyoung could see the shadow of stubble above his upper lip.

There were no major injuries on his face. After being cleaned up, Doyoung saw some slight bruising. The few cuts he spotted seemed to glisten with the layer of salve they had put over. He was fine, just like Jungwoo had said.

Doyoung knew he should go but he couldn’t. He hesitantly reached out and pushed back the long, dark hair that stuck to the stranger’s forehead. His skin was warm to the touch and as Doyoung touched him, he let out a long groan. It took Doyoung by surprise and he pulled back, holding his hand to his chest.

“Mhm, a-alpha,” the stranger murmured.

Doyoung held his breath.

The stranger whined a little and Doyoung stepped back from the bed. It was time for him to go. He’d never seen an omega in this state and as much as he’d been prepared to control himself, he was itching to reach out. He needed to go but as much as he willed his feet to move, he remained in place, watching the stranger on the bed begin to wriggle and cry out in need.

The young man turned his head and slowly opened his eyes. Doyoung met his eyes immediately and it was too late. He froze, watching as the stranger fully opened his eyes.

“Who are you?”

Doyoung blinked, unsure of what to say. Was he that confused? “Doyoung,” he replied.

“Doyoung,” the young man repeated. “Mark.”

“What?”

“Mark, my name.” A loud groan as the young man, Mark, turned. “Come.”

And Doyoung’s body obeyed. He stepped up to the bed again and allowed himself to be stared at for a moment. “Is something wrong?”

“Are you here to become my mate?” Mark asked.

Doyoung inhaled sharply. “No,” he said. “I was just checking on you. I’m not your mate. You’re recovering. You shouldn’t speak.”

Mark huffed. “Fine,” he murmured. He gave the room a quick look over and then returned his attention to Doyoung, looking up at him through long lashes. “Was I not up to your expectations?”

“Doyoung.”

Doyoung backed away from the bed. “I have to go now,” he told Mark. He shook his head, pushing away the haziness, and turned, finding Taeyong in the doorway. “Taeyong, I can e—”

“It’s one thing to play with me, Doyoung, but it’s another to go against the words of the doctor,” Taeyong said. He looked past Doyoung, to Mark on the bed. Without looking away from Mark, Taeyong spoke. “Her Majesty requests your presence.”

“I’m coming.” Doyoung walked over, stopping beside Taeyong. Their shoulders brushed and Taeyong looked a bit miffed. Doyoung leaned in enough to whisper. “His name is Mark. Find out where his family is.”

“Your Highness, I—”

“I can find the way to my mother just fine.”

* * *

Doyoung should’ve known what to expect. As unpredictable as Mother could be, some things were expected. He had seen it happen to Donghyun. Of course, it would also happen to him.

“You’re an adult, Doyoung, and you’re my only son now,” Mother had said. There was pain in her voice and when he looked at her, she’d been clutching her skirt in her hands in a way she only did when she was upset. “So you must be responsible and do what you need to do for your kingdom.”

She wouldn’t have any arguments but Doyoung wasn’t going to put one up. He accepted it. If Donghyun had been able to, there was no reason why Doyoung shouldn’t.

It’d been a few days since the meeting with his mother and Doyoung had been presented with different offers. Taeyong presented them quietly, leaving him to think after. Doyoung appreciated it but more often than not, he set everything aside and busied himself with other things.

He couldn’t bring himself to think about marrying someone at the moment. He knew that he’d have to make a decision soon and when the time to announce it came, he would, but for now, he wanted some quiet. 

There’d been other things on his mind.

“Taeyong, anything on Mark?”

Taeyong paused. “We’ve asked everyone and no one knows who he is. If he gave you a false name or—”

“You confirmed it yourself, didn’t you?” Doyoung sighed deeply. “Well, if no one knows who he is, we have to continue until we find his family.”

“He said he has no family,” Taeyong said. He cleared his throat. “He’s more awake today. When I went to see him, he was sitting up. We were able to speak for longer. Doyoung, he told me something and—”

“What?” Doyoung looked at Taeyong, catching the frustrated expression on his face. “I’m sorry for interrupting again but tell me.”

“He’s not from here.” Taeyong set down the papers in his hands. “Doyoung, we’re working to get him back where he’s supposed to be but those matters no longer concern you. You should be focusing on this.”

Taeyong placed his hand on the stack of papers. Doyoung looked at them, knowing that the names of people from his kingdom and surrounding ones were written on them, asking to be allowed an audience with Doyoung.

“I’ll take care of it after I know what has happened.” Doyoung couldn’t explain why he was so intrigued by Mark. He was a stranger. Doyoung hadn’t seen or spoken to him since the day he found Mark in the bushes. He only heard updates about him through pestering Taeyong. “If I could see him before he goes, I want to properly apologize.”

“Doyoung, you know that’s not a good idea,” Taeyong replied. Doyoung knew he was pushing Taeyong more these days and he was thankful that Taeyong remained so patient with him. “Besides, he has requested to not see you.”

“Not see me?”

“We’re taking care of it,” Taeyong repeated. “ _I’m_ taking care of it.”

Taeyong left a few minutes later, leaving Doyoung confused. He sat back down, pushing aside the papers Taeyong had left behind for him to go through.

He had requested not to see Doyoung? 

It made no sense. Doyoung wouldn’t force Mark to see him but he did want to apologize. He also wanted to see Mark in a better condition. The sight of Mark on the bed, helpless and in heat, had plagued Doyoung’s mind the last few nights. There was no getting rid of that image and as guilty as Doyoung felt remembering that scene, he couldn’t help it.

He remembered Mark’s tan skin, his cheeks flushed red, and his expression… There was no describing that expression. The look in his eyes was something Doyoung had never seen before. And that combined with the gentle sounds that escaped past Mark’s lips. It was enticing, he thought, and completely alluring.

If Doyoung had ever dreamt of someone in unseemly ways, he would never admit it. Not that he had dreamt of Mark in that kind of way.

He hadn’t. He couldn’t imagine a stranger like that. It would be wrong of him.

Doyoung sighed, pushing the thoughts away. If Mark didn’t want to see him, that was fine by Doyoung... As long as he was feeling better, Doyoung didn’t mind it at all. Taeyong was right, he decided. He needed to focus on his responsibilities and the soon he decided, the sooner everything would be okay again.

He knew that Mother was planning festivities that would allow Doyoung to meet with each person that wanted an audience with him. She had given him that much information during their meeting, at least. Doyoung hoped he found someone worthwhile at the ball.

There were plenty of familiar and unfamiliar names in the papers. It was an overwhelming amount. Of course.

Crown Prince Donghyun had married young, not allowing anyone much opportunity to ask for his hand, and he’d already passed. Now that Doyoung was to take after Mother and he remained unmarried at this age, many were looking toward him, wondering who and when it would be. It was only a matter of time.

Doyoung would meet them all. Just to satisfy his mother’s worry and perhaps get Taeyong off his back. He’d meet with everyone and choose. Donghyun had the opportunity to meet Eunjoo through something similar and he had grown to love her truly, deeply until his death. Doyoung could have the same thing.

And if it came to it, Doyoung would bear it for the sake of his kingdom.

He stood from his chair and left his room, closing the door behind him quietly. The few people walking around in the halls greeted him with deep bows and he acknowledged them with a nod.

There had been other matters he’d discussed with Mother beside the future of his love life. He’d gotten an answer about the night the prisoners came to the palace. They were all taken from the Hado region, she’d told Doyoung, and they would be taking jobs around the palace. Unlike those that the palace employed, the prisoners wouldn’t be compensated for their work but they would be taken care of.

“They did nothing wrong but be in the wrong place and the wrong time,” Mother had said. “There’s not many. Most of them will take care of the lighter work. Avoid them where you can.”

“And how will I know which ones they are?”

Like Doyoung had told Jungwoo before, there were hundreds of people that took care of the palace grounds, inside and out. Doyoung did know a few of them. The few maids that took care of his rooms and the people that served them at dinner were familiar faces, even if he did not know their names. The head groundskeeper and some other people that took care of the gardens were others Doyoung saw around when he walked. But Doyoung was at a loss with anyone else.

“Their names are a bit different,” Mother had said.

She hadn’t given an example. Still, Doyoung didn’t think he’d run into any of those people. If anything, they were probably given the worst of the easy jobs, ones that required them to stay out of sight for the most part. 

If they were from the Hado region, Doyoung might be able to find a book or something that held common names, but there was no telling which part of the Hado region they were from. Doyoung knew that the disputes over the area were older than he was. Mother had been pushing for the land since she had been crowned in her youth.

And maybe Doyoung wouldn’t be around long enough to see it fixed.

All the more reason he should marry sooner, he thought.

The thought of putting all his training into use was a bit intimidating. He had trained with the best soldiers of the Onan Army, and he’d been regarded with honor for his great accomplishments as a member but he’d never seen a moment of real combat.

Mother was making preparations and at a moment’s notice, Doyoung could be sent out, leading his own battalion. He would be in the middle of it all.

And if he died, he’d die like his brother.

“Doyoung?”

Doyoung was pulled out of his thoughts and he looked around, taking in his surroundings. He’d ended up in front of the door that led to the rooms Mark was in. In front of him, Taeyong with his hands crossed over his chest and a displeased expression on his face.

“I told you, you shouldn’t be here,” Taeyong said. 

“I—” Was there any point in trying to explain to Taeyong he’d come here without knowing? “Can I not see him once?”

Taeyong said nothing and stepped back inside, returning a moment later. “For a minute,” he murmured. He opened the door and Doyoung stepped inside. On the other side of the room, sitting on the sofa, was Mark. “Mark, would you like me to stay?”

“It’s fine.” Mark’s voice was different now that he was better. It was deeper and smoother. “We can have a moment alone.”

Doyoung took his appearance in. He was sitting up straight, holding a teacup in his hands. There was no shake to his hands, meaning he was strong. His cheeks looked fuller than the first time Doyoung had seen him. He noticed just how broad Mark’s shoulders were now. This was an entirely different person than the one Doyoung had found in the middle of bushes and bramble.

Taeyong stepped out quietly. Doyoung remained standing by the door, unsure of whether it was okay for him to approach. Mark seemed unbothered and it gave Doyoung enough courage to take a few steps, enough to reach one of the armchairs and sit.

“I’m relieved to see you’re well,” Doyoung said carefully, studying Mark’s expression carefully for any change. “Taeyong has been keeping me updated on you.”

“I have you to thank?” Mark asked. He set his teacup onto the saucer and the table, pushing himself off the sofa. Doyoung blinked as Mark took a few steps, rounding the table. He was about a meter away. Doyoung knew it was too close when he caught a smell of sweetness. It was more subdued now but just as distracting for him. “You should have left me there.”

“If I had left you, you could’ve gotten hurt,” Doyoung explained. “And as someone responsible for everyone on these grounds, it would have been wrong to ignore you.”

“Doyoung, right?” Before Doyoung could answer, Mark continued, his eyes narrowing a little. “Or should I say ‘Your Royal Highness’?”

Doyoung stood up. “You don’t have to do that. I introduced myself as Doyoung. There’s no need for the title.” 

He could sense some hostility from Mark and he wasn’t sure where it came from. He could understand Mark being upset about being discovered in the state he was in but this wasn’t embarrassment or surprise. It was real, hot anger. Doyoung had never needed to put anyone into place but if he needed to, Mark would have to face the consequences.

Doyoung held his breath, regarding Mark carefully. He kept his stance neutral but he’d already found about fifty ways to put Mark down if he had to. By the look on Mark’s face, Mark had also found a way or two to get Doyoung down. 

“Your Highness,” Mark said, his voice a bit calmer than before. “While I do thank you for allowing me to stay, I know I have taken advantage of it. Your… friend will take me back to where I’m supposed to be soon.”

“And where is that?” Doyoung asked quietly. 

Mark huffed out a laugh. “You’ll find this funny, I’m sure,” he said.

Doyoung waited and Mark came closer. When Doyoung saw Mark reaching for his face, he reacted quickly, taking Mark’s wrist and holding onto it tightly. Mark’s wrist was thin and Doyoung was able to close his hand around it nicely. Mark put up no fight and Doyoung remained still, keeping him at a distance.

“Your Highness, you’re looking at one of your prisoners.” Doyoung let go of Mark in surprise and Mark resumed his movement. The way he touched Doyoung’s face was alarming, running his fingers along Doyoung’s jaw and sending an electric feeling through Doyoung’s body. Mark paused, keeping his hand on Doyoung’s face. “You never thought you’d see one of us this close, right?”

No, Doyoung wanted to say.

He’d never expected to come across one of the people his mother had told him about and the last thing he thought would happen was this. He had not only helped one but he had brought them into the palace and looked over them. He’d given the family doctor money to treat them. If Mother found out he’d done this, Doyoung would have to repay it all.

Doyoung wanted to speak but he found himself frozen, his breathing caught in his throat. Mark was too close. Like this, Doyoung could smell the vanilla and chamomile in his scent, and it was so enticing. And whether or not Mark knew what it was doing, it didn’t seem like he cared. Doyoung inhaled, feeling his knees buckle.

“You’ll never see me again, Your Royal Highness,” Mark whispered.

With that, Mark pulled away. He walked around Doyoung.

Doyoung gasped for air, dropping back into the armchair. His entire body felt like it was on fire. He brought a hand up to touch his face, feeling how warm his cheeks were. There was no doubt he was red in the face. He barely heard Mark ask Taeyong something and the door close as they both left him behind.

* * *

Doyoung was led to the spacious ballroom where about a hundred or so people around his age were, mingling with glasses of wine in their hands. He was directed towards the center of the ballroom and everyone hushed.

“Everyone,” a voice said. Doyoung turned in a circle, trying to find the source. The floor had been cleared out and he could see eyes watching him from the sides of the room. “It is an honor to present, the Crown Prince, Doyoung of Onan.”

Doyoung stood in the middle of the room as everyone around him clapped. He managed to smile and bow but he could feel his face burning. He was a bit embarrassed and suddenly the suit on his body seemed suffocating.

“Our prince will now begin,” the voice said.

Doyoung took that as the sign to leave the center of the floor. He knew what to do. He had prepared for the ball beforehand. It was a tradition for the person being presented to choose someone they deemed was a probable choice for marriage. He just had to pick one person to approach and then everyone would go back to what they were doing. 

He didn’t know where he was going. He walked towards the right and scanned a few faces, some of them familiar but most of them not. After a moment, he stopped right in front of a guy and bowed.

“Hello,” he said, “I’m Doyoung.”

The guy stared back at him with wide eyes. “Oh.” They frowned when Doyoung looked at them expectantly.

“Aren’t you supposed to bow back?” Doyoung asked, leaning in slightly so only they could hear. “Introduce yourself?”

The guy eyed Doyoung carefully but he bowed anyway. “Hello,” he said when he had straightened up. “I’m Jaehyun.”

“Jaehyun,” Doyoung repeated. He had never heard that name before. Which family could this guy belong to? He looked at the guy and then smiled, extending his arm and presenting his hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Jaehyun grinned and took Doyoung’s hand. “It’s your pleasure.”

The ball officially started after Doyoung approached Jaehyun. There was music playing and servers were walking around holding trays of drinks and food. Doyoung had pulled two flutes of champagne from a tray for them and led Jaehyun to an empty part of the ballroom, sitting at the table prepared for them. 

Jaehyun was an interesting person. He was here on behalf of Icheon. Doyoung quickly found out that Jaehyun was the cousin of the Crown Princess. So it was actually Yunoh, but he said that he wasn’t too fond of his real name, therefore he was Jaehyun. 

“Are all balls you hold like this?” Jaehyun asked as their conversation after their introductions dwindled to silence. He was looking at the several people dancing, an amused smile on his face.

Doyoung watched them as well. They were dancing freely. Traditional dancing wasn’t as popular as it had been when his older family members had celebrated these kinds of events. Doyoung had learned how to dance but not in this fashion. Never before in his life had he seen dancing like that.

“I suppose so… They’re something,” Doyoung said quietly.

Jaehyun smiled and looked at Doyoung. “We don’t have the chance to attend many in Icheon.”

“Understandably so,” Doyoung said. Icheon culture was much different than the Onan culture. From what Doyoung had read, celebrations with music and dance were not as common. “Thank you for coming. Apologies if you feel a bit out of place.” 

Jaehyun waved his hand, dismissing the apology. “I’ve snuck out and attended my fair share in my youth,” he confessed, taking a sip of his champagne flute. “But if I marry you, I become part of this family and don’t have to sneak out, right?”

Doyoung felt his face grow warm. “Marry me?”

Jaehyun laughed loudly and pushed Doyoung softly. “It’s a joke, hyung,” he said, emphasizing the honorific just a bit. “The chances of you choosing someone from Icheon is lower than the chances of you choosing someone from Seung. Just know there won’t be any hard feelings between us as long as Onan and Icheon become best friends when you’re the king.”

Doyoung didn’t say anything, which made Jaehyun laugh again. It was quiet between them after. They continued to watch the people dancing, nodding along to the music. After a few minutes, a young woman approached them.

Jaehyun nudged Doyoung in the side. Doyoung looked at her wide-eyed. She bowed, catching Doyoung by surprise.

“My name is Eri, and I am here on behalf of the town of Kalsan,” she said when she straightened up. She smiled. “I’m here to court you, Prince Dongyoung.”

Doyoung blinked, confused, and beside him, Jaehyun laughed loudly, eyes crinkling and mouth open wide. Eri laughed quietly, bringing her hand up to her face. Doyoung could feel all the blood in his body rush to his face. He was being courted.

“Well, would you look at that, Doyoung-hyung,” Jaehyun said, throwing an arm around his shoulder. 

“Would you look at that, indeed,” Doyoung murmured.

“Lady Eri of Kalsan, nice to meet you,” Jaehyun greeted, a smile on his face as he extended his other arm out and took Lady Eri’s hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it. “I’m sure Doyoung here is looking forward to getting to know all about you.”

Doyoung had known Jaehyun for less than an hour, yet it felt like Jaehyun had known him his entire life. 

Jaehyun pulled himself away and smiled at Doyoung one more time. “Good luck, Crown Prince.”

Before Doyoung could form a response, Jaehyun was already wandering off and approaching someone that he recognized as the Prince of Toka. Doyoung looked at Lady Eri, who only smiled. He felt a little dizzy.

“Your Highness,” she said, turning back to him.

“Shall we dance?” Doyoung asked, standing and offering his hand to her.

Lady Eri was interesting, Doyoung came to find out. She laughed and smiled easily. It was a bit difficult for Doyoung to keep up in the dancing but she had offered some assistance, teaching him some basic steps and they kept to the side to avoid bothering the other pairs on the dance floor.

Doyoung learned her family was important to the kingdom. They took care of the town on the northern shore, operating many trades that took place there. She was educated and also well-skilled in a variety of things. Marrying her would be a delight for his mother, and it was clear that Lady Eri would be just as pleased.

“Your Highness, you might not recall but I’ve admired you since we were young,” she confessed as the song ended and they took a break. Her hand in Doyoung’s was soft and delicate, and she moved with grace, her dress swishing this way and that. “We met twice as children and while I might not have left a lasting impression on you, you surely left one on me.”

“Oh, well, that’s…”

“I know you’re one of the most desirable bachelors and I’m not the only after your hand here,” Lady Eri said. 

Doyoung couldn’t remember how or when but at some point through the night, he had been taken from Lady Eri’s side and taken someone new to dance. They got a moment to speak, barely catching each other’s names and Doyoung got to hear their brief introduction, another confession of admiration before he was approached by someone else.

He must’ve danced with nearly everyone by the time the ball was beginning to dwindle to nothing. His feet hurt from the continuous dancing and the muscles in his face felt stiff after having smiled for so long. He was sure it looked painful now, given how everyone who seemed to want to approach backed off after a glance in his direction. He’d have to give his apologies to those he hadn’t met with tonight.

Jaehyun returned to him at some point, taking the seat next to him. He offered a new flute of champagne and Doyoung took it, sipping on it for a moment. He looked at those on the dance floor. They were all here for him but he wasn’t going to be surprised if other unions formed from this. As desirable as Doyoung was, he wouldn’t be able to beat the instant connections some people felt between themselves.

For a second, Doyoung thought of—

“Your Highness,” Jaehyun said, leaning in a bit, “Would you like to take a walk?”

Doyoung backed away from Jaehyun, eyeing him. When he found nothing that would betray Jaehyun’s motivations on his face, he hummed. “I would like that,” he replied, setting down his flute. “Let’s get away from here.”

Jaehyun offered his hand to Doyoung, who took it and stood. A few eyes drifted towards them but the attention was redirected as a new song started, upbeat and quick, pulling more people to dance. Doyoung and Jaehyun left through the back of the ballroom, through the halls that led to the kitchens.

Doyoung knew there was a way outside somewhere and when he found the door, he pushed it open, allowing Jaehyun to step out first. The air was a bit chilly when Doyoung stepped out. He brought his hands up to his mouth, breathing onto them. Jaehyun glanced at him and then stepped to the side, creating more space between them.

“I must say that the palace is very lovely,” Jaehyun said finally.

He was looking out in the distance. It was dark but the moon above provided a pale spotlight for everything below. The forest in the distance, the gardens that made a maze, the fountains—it all had a soft glow. The rustle of the leaves as the breeze moved through the space and the water of the fountains filled the silence until Jaehyun spoke again.

“The entire kingdom is lovely.”

Doyoung was unsure of what Jaehyun was thinking or feeling. “Icheon is just as lovely,” he said carefully. He motioned to the staircase that led down to the path below. “But if you like Onan this much, I should show you around before you go, right?” 

Jaehyun smiled and nodded.

Together, they went down the stairs and Doyoung led the way. He’d walked the grounds thousands of times and he made sure that Jaehyun stayed nearby as he explained a few interesting facts about everything. The space between them was more than an arm’s length and Doyoung thought about moving closer but he sensed Jaehyun didn’t want that.

“Doyoung-hyung,” Jaehyun said, interrupting him. “Do you already have someone you like?”

Doyoung froze, staring at Jaehyun for a long minute. “What?” he asked, blinking a few times. “Why do you ask that?”

“You’ve been keeping your distance,” Jaehyun noted. Before Doyoung could say he thought Jaehyun was the one keeping his distance, Jaehyun continued. “Do you really not know?”

“Know what?”

“Every part of your scent is saying you don’t want this.” Jaehyun tried to come closer and Doyoung stepped back. Jaehyun motioned to the space between them. “And for that to happen, there must be someone you already are interested in.”

“How could you possibly come to that conclusion?” Doyoung asked. He kept his hands up but Jaehyun didn’t step towards him again. “You can’t tell that from someone’s scent.”

“I know because I’ve gone through it, too,” Jaehyun said. He tilted his head in question. “So is there? Someone, you like?”

“I’ve known you for one night,” Doyoung said instead. “If there was, I wouldn’t tell a stranger.”

“Ah, there is.” Jaehyun smiled. There was no judgment and he didn’t look upset. Instead, Doyoung could sense Jaehyun relaxed. Jaehyun scuffed the tip of his shoe against the gravel. “And they’re here tonight?”

“I don’t have anyone I like,” Doyoung insisted. He took a deep breath and was able to catch Jaehyun’s scent. It mixed in with the flowers around them. There was something floral about it but also a bit of spice. It was the first time in the entire night Doyoung had picked up on someone’s scent. Doyoung shook his head to get rid of the thoughts. “There’s no one.”

“Did you fall in love with someone you’re not supposed to?” Jaehyun’s question sounded wistful and Doyoung knew there was something else behind it. Doyoung studied Jaehyun’s expression, seeing how the moonlight caught in his eyes, making them seem to sparkle. There was something sad about it. “Did you fall in love with someone who’s forbidden?”

Doyoung wished the face that came into his mind was one he didn’t know.

* * *

_Mother of Fire, take pity on us sinners._

Doyoung clasped his hands together, dropping his head down so his knuckles pressed against his forehead. He closed his eyes tightly but the tears still managed to fall, rolling down his cheeks. He could taste the saltiness of them as he swiped his tongue across his lips. 

_Mother of Fire, take pity on me, a sinner._

If someone found Doyoung this way, they would surely be surprised. Doyoung didn’t beg like this. He didn’t cry up and ask for pity from The Mother. The only time he had ever done so was when Donghyun died. Doyoung had gathered any faith he had and prayed, the hardest he’d ever done in his life. But that was for Donghyun… this was…

_Mother of Fire, forgive me and accept me into your arms._

The way Doyoung shook now was alarming. He tried to shake away the feeling of guilt and the face from his mind. Never had Doyoung done something so wrong and the guilt ate at him slowly. If he did this again, he wouldn’t be able to continue, he thought.

His dirtied sheets laid in a heap on his bed and his discarded clothes were somewhere within them. Doyoung had since bathed and changed into something cleaner but the dirtiness of his actions remained, sticking to his skin like a leech and draining everything from him.

“One day, Doyoung, you’ll feel so guilty, you’ll have no choice but to get on your knees and pray,” Donghyun had said once.

He’d always been someone strong in his faith, upholding the beliefs he held so dear to his heart. Doyoung had admired his dedication to The Mother even if his own didn’t quite reach the same levels. He had doubted such a day would come but now that it had and Doyoung was crying, praying over and over, he found it surreal.

He needed to visit his brother.

* * *

Eunjoo was too tired to accompany Doyoung and he had asked Taeyong to stay behind. He needed some time alone with Donghyun. Taeyong had a bouquet prepared however and Doyoung held it carefully against his chest as he made his way down. For the first time, Doyoung was nervous about meeting his brother. 

He passed the tree from that day and stopped for a moment, looking in its direction. The bushes and bramble around it had been cut down. Since the groundskeeper had to make many odd cuts, leaving it as such would’ve been unsightly. The tree didn’t match the rest of them, standing out with so much less around it, and Doyoung wondered if one day, it would blend in with the rest of them again. He wondered if he’d be able to forget it was this tree.

Doyoung continued, pushing away thoughts of that day. He couldn’t keep remembering the feeling, for his own sake. It haunted him enough.

Finding Donghyun’s gravestone was easy and Doyoung crouched by it, placing the bouquet in front of it. He held onto the gravestone, the marble cold underneath his palm. Doyoung huffed and sat down on the grass, leaning back on his hands.

“Hyung,” he murmured. His eyes looked over the marble, reading everything engraved on it. Doyoung had read it thousands of times, the sight of his brother’s name and the years he’d lived all too ingrained into his mind. “I prayed the other day.”

There was silence of course.

Doyoung sighed. “I asked noona for some of your things,” he confessed. He remembered Eunjoo’s surprised face from earlier when he managed to find her and ask. “She was shocked but she agreed. I hope you don’t mind.”

More silence.

“I know you won’t,” Doyoung said quietly. “You always wanted me to have those things of yours. I’ll use them well.”

Doyoung expected silence again and when he heard a noise, he looked over his shoulder. There was nothing. He looked to the other side but found the area empty. When he turned his attention back to the gravestone, he jumped, surprised to find someone in front of him, crouching beside the other side of the gravestone.

“Your Highness.”

“You,” Doyoung said. He pushed himself up, dusting his hands on his pants and standing up. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been assigned to work here.” A sour expression crossed Mark’s face. “You must know that at least.”

“Here?” Doyoung asked, looking at Mark, who looked up at him through his lashes. 

“I clean the stones,” Mark replied, standing up and dusting himself off as well. “Most of them aren’t too bad. It’s just the old ones that are dirty.”

“You’re not supposed to be working—”

“In my position, I can’t refuse,” Mark interrupted. “Her Majesty made sure of it.”

“If I could—” Mark clicked his tongue, cutting Doyoung off. He paused, taking a deep breath. “Mark, if I could help you in any way, I would. Did Taeyong bring you back to meet with the doctor?”

“He wasn’t allowed to,” Mark said curtly. “Her Majesty made sure of that as well.”

“Mark,” Doyoung said.

“You don’t get to call me by my name, Your Highness. I shouldn’t even be talking to you.” Mark looked at the gravestone and then at the flowers in front of it. “Your brother.”

Doyoung should have corrected Mark. To Mark, Donghyun was _His Royal Highness_. Only Doyoung and others close to Donghyun could refer to him as something else. But he stayed silent.

“I’ll leave you be.” The look on Mark’s face was something Doyoung couldn’t understand. Even Mark’s scent betrayed nothing. It was that same sweet vanilla and chamomile but there was nothing else to it. It was neutral. “Your Highness.”

Mark left, leaving Doyoung behind. Doyoung watched Mark retreat until he disappeared behind larger headstones, nothing but the faint remnants of his scent left behind. Doyoung inhaled deeply, the overwhelming sweetness nearly prickling at his skin. He looked back down at the headstone and crouched again, brushing his hand over his brother’s name.

“I wasn’t expecting to introduce you so soon,” Doyoung whispered. “Hyung, I’m sure you already know who Mark is becoming to me.”

Doyoung wanted to say that since Donghyun's passing he’d become more open about his feelings but the truth was that he hadn’t. If anything, Donghyun’s death had given Doyoung more reason to keep to himself. If no one knew Doyoung’s true feelings, no one would be able to hurt him. Donghyun had known Doyoung well enough in his life and the pain that came with losing him was unbearable. Doyoung wouldn’t be able to go through that again.

So he spoke little about Mark and who he was becoming. Doyoung knew well that Mark, his face, and his voice were becoming an issue. Not once but twice now, Doyoung had thought of Mark in inappropriate ways, and just now, Mark had made it clear that he felt nothing positive towards Doyoung. He didn’t even seem appreciative of Doyoung saving him. They were strangers so Doyoung had no clue what he could’ve done to make Mark feel this way. Perhaps it was just a deep embarrassment of the situation. Doyoung made no judgment on Mark but he imagined being found by a stranger in such a vulnerable state and having to face them afterward would be humiliating.

Doyoung remembered the day in the room when he’d first gotten a good look at Mark. He’d been whining, tossing, and turning, asking for relief that only a certain kind of person could provide.

 _Mhm, a-alpha._

A relief that only Doyoung could provide.

No, Doyoung thought. He pulled his hand back from the headstone, holding his hand to his chest as if he’d been burned. He took a few deep breaths and then looked at his hand. The cuts and scrapes had healed rather quickly, the scabs peeling off the day before the large ball held in his honor. There weren’t any noticeable scars on his palms but he could see the faint lines where he’d gotten hurt. Forever, he’d be scarred, a reminder of who he’d saved and how.

_Mother of Fire…_

There was no prayer for this. Doyoung wasn’t well-versed in the scripture but he knew what this meant. Scars were reminders of punishable actions. Was saving Mark a punishable action, even though Doyoung had saved him?

Doyoung remembered Jaehyun and his questions. He hadn’t seen or spoken to Jaehyun since. The ball had been nearly a week ago and Doyoung had managed to push aside the night, forgetting it in favor of other things. But now, Doyoung could remember. The sadness in Jaehyun’s voice had been surprising.

For a moment, Doyoung wondered if Jaehyun had scars and what punishable actions had put them there.

Forbidden, Jaehyun had said.

Wanting something forbidden was a punishable action. Doyoung knew this well as he’d been told many times growing up. If he wanted too much or something he couldn’t have, he’d be punished when he died.

“I have already given in to temptation,” Doyoung confessed to the headstone.

He looked at his hands again.

If Doyoung had already committed a punishable action by touching Mark, would it be wrong if he did it again? He reasoned that since he already committed the act, there was no possibility he could be punished twice.

But was it really Mark he wanted?

* * *

Doyoung stood still.

Several young men and women circled him, pulling at his clothing. They murmured and called out orders to each other. They pulled out several other clothing items. A young woman pulled off the coat he had on and helped him slip on another. It must’ve been the sixth time he had changed in the last half hour.

After another fifteen minutes, they finished up, collected all the clothing items and tools, and a young man turned to tell him they were done. He bowed and Doyoung thanked him, giving a small bow of his head in return.

When Doyoung turned to look at the mirror, he was surprised, in a good way. He looked nice. The colors were the colors of his family, a dark green and maroon. The velvet of the coat seemed to shine in the light when Doyoung moved to inspect the outfit further. The bright white of his waistcoat was almost blinding compared to the dark colors of the velvety fabrics draped on his body. The coat was well-fitted. After standing still and allowing the women to take his measurements for the better part of half an hour, the clothes were adjusted right down to the centimeter. As long as Doyoung didn’t lose or gain any weight in the next few weeks, they wouldn’t have to touch his clothes again.

The shoes on his feet were also new. The new leather and buckled glistened in the light. They were a little too big, not even by an entire centimeter, but the women said they would go back to the shoemaker and have them remade to fit him perfectly, even though Doyoung insisted they were fine as is. 

As Doyoung continued to admire the handiwork of the women, a knock at the door sounded through the room. 

“Come in!” Doyoung called.

The door opened and in came Taeyong and behind him, Miss Kim.

“That looks marvelous,” Miss Kim exclaimed, clapping her hands together. She walked over and looked at the clothes herself, gently touching the fabric.

“Your Highness, you have to undress and begin getting ready for your meeting with Lady Sooyoung,” Taeyong said, not sparing a second glance at Doyoung. In his hands, he held a small notebook. “She is due any minute now. You will have tea in the garden and then go out for a walk. Preparations have already been made. You are all that’s left.”

Doyoung sighed, feeling himself deflate. Miss Kim also sighed but motioned for Doyoung to come over. She carefully began pulling off the clothing pieces and folded them up neatly. Once Doyoung was left in his underwear, Taeyong collected his clothes and left the room. He came back with a new set of clothes and Miss Kim quickly helped Doyoung put them on. She gave him a pat on the shoulder when she finished. 

Doyoung followed Taeyong out of the room.

“Lady Park is?” Doyoung asked. He smoothed his coat down and tugged at his collar, loosening it a bit. The name wasn’t too common and Doyoung was sure he’d heard of the young woman before, but he couldn’t bring a face to the name.

“She is the daughter of Lord and Lady Sooyoung, from Naebu,” Taeyong informed him. “One year younger than you. Educated, polite, talented in dance and vocal performance.”

Doyoung sighed. “She sounds perfect.”

“Her Majesty expressed her satisfaction with Lady Sooyoung and hopes you hold her in your favor,” Taeyong added, not sparing a glance back at him.

“Of course,” Doyoung murmured bitterly.

The weather outside was nice but Doyoung felt the need to shrug off his coat. He wondered if Lady Sooyoung felt the rising temperature, waiting in the garden, knowing the young woman would most likely be dressed in layers of clothing.

They arrived in a small area surrounded by neatly trimmed hedges and flowers of all kinds. A small table in the center with an umbrella was prepared. Two women were seated at the table, speaking quietly. Doyoung approached the table, Taeyong giving him a bow and retreating to the castle. 

The two women stood from their spots at the table. Both of them bowed their heads and Doyoung did the same. “Good morning, ladies,” he said softly.

The two women looked up at him. It was easy for Doyoung to identify which woman was Lady Sooyoung. He turned to her, offering his hand to her. She placed a gloved hand in his and he brought it up to his lips, barely touching the back of her hand. 

“Lady Sooyoung, a pleasure to meet you,” he said.

She smiled as she pulled her hand away. “Your Highness,” she gave him a small curtsy. “It’s a pleasure to be here.”

The other woman simply bowed her head and stepped away from the table, going to sit at a stone bench nearby, leaving them alone to speak. Doyoung pulled out Lady Sooyoung’s chair slightly and as she sat, he pushed it in slightly. He sat across from her.

“My aunt complimented your gardens,” she said gently. She motioned to the woman that was carefully watching them from afar.

“I will be sure to relay that to our gardeners,” Doyoung smiled. 

Lady Sooyoung was extremely beautiful. The hat on her head was large and held a few ornate decorations, ruffles, and a large ribbon in the back. Taeyong wondered how she was able to hold up all that weight on her head. Her hair itself was a beautiful shade of dark brown, and it was brought up, gathered at the back of her head, loose curls running down to her mid-back. 

The color of her hair complemented her complexion. Her skin was fair and bright, a contrast to her dark hair. Her face was clear of blemishes and Doyoung couldn’t see much makeup on her face, except perhaps a light dusting of red rouge on her cheeks. Her eyes were genuine and so was her smile. 

She wore a simpler dress compared to the various other women Doyoung had meetings with previously. The dress itself was a peach color, with the other parts of her dress various shades of the pretty peach. It suited her perfectly, in his opinion.

“Your Highness, Lady Sooyoung,” a young man said, approaching the table with a tray. The tray held a tea set. He set it down and Lady Sooyoung clapped as she spotted the tea leaves.

“Marvelous,” she exclaimed softly. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” Doyoung said, dismissing the man with a small wave. 

Doyoung began to prepare the tea, and Lady Sooyoung smiled. “Thank you, Your Highness,” she bowed her head slightly as Doyoung motioned to a teacup. She lifted it to her lips and took a small sip. “It’s delicious.”

“I am glad you like it,” Doyoung said, lifting his own teacup. “Please try the pastries. They go very well with the tea.”

The two spoke as they drank their tea. After addressing each other formally for the better half of an hour, Doyoung insisted that she call him by his name. Lady Sooyoung had tried it out once, blushing furiously and hiding her face shyly behind a small pastry as Doyoung laughed. After two more times, she seemed comfortable enough and also insisted that Doyoung call her by her given name: Sooyoung.

Once the table was cleared and they had finished their tea, Doyoung stood, offering his arm to Sooyoung. She took it and allowed him to lead them to a small path by the stairs that lead up to the castle.

The sun was high in the sky now and Sooyoung brought out a small umbrella that matched her dress and hat. She opened it and let the shade cover her and Doyoung. 

“And do you have many friends in Naebu, Miss Sooyoung?” he asked, looking down at her. 

She smiled. “Not many, but I do have a few friends that I trust,” she replied. 

“Tell me about them,” Doyoung said. “I’d like to hear about them.”

“Well,” she started. “I have one friend I truly trust, really. She lives nearby the manor and visits often. She’s very smart and extremely beautiful. We’ve known each other since we were girls.”

“Ah,” Doyoung smiled. He looked at her and caught her eye. The look in them said that Sooyoung felt strongly about her friend. “And you like her?”

Sooyoung turned away. “We are friends.”

Doyoung was aware that Sooyoung’s aunt was walking behind them, close enough to see their faces clearly, but far enough to not be able to hear their conversation. Doyoung was used to the ladies he met with having chaperones, and even the younger men he had meetings with, but he couldn’t help but feel that the older woman’s presence made Sooyoung hesitant and a little drawn in. Doyoung wondered how Sooyoung would act, what Sooyoung would say if she had complete freedom.

“In the same way that we are friends?” Doyoung questioned.

Sooyoung hummed. “Would you say we are friends?” she countered, looking back at him, a teasing look in her eyes. “We’ve known each other for about three hours.”

“I don’t see why we can’t be.”

“We are friends,” Sooyoung said cautiously, “but not in the same way.”

Doyoung nodded, looking forward. They had gone through most of the garden after walking for an hour. Sooyoung had mentioned the flowers she liked, making them stop so she could see them up close, eyes glittering as she held the soft petals in her palm. Doyoung had only smiled, mentally taking note of which ones she pointed out. 

“I hope that I can have the pleasure of meeting your friend,” Doyoung said once they came back to where they had started their walk. 

Sooyoung laughed, making Doyoung smile. “That would be the most wonderful thing if you could.”

A young man approached Sooyoung’s aunt and told her something, which prompted her to walk over.

“Sooyoung,” she said. “We must go now.”

Sooyoung pulled away from Doyoung. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Your Highness.”

She smiled. Her eyes all but disappeared and Doyoung smiled back. “The pleasure is mine. Thank you for coming all the way here. Please take care.”

Sooyoung’s aunt took her hand. They began to make their way up the steps to the castle but Sooyoung stopped. She turned and looked at him. “And if I bring her here with me next time?” she asked.

Her aunt’s eyes widened and she said something into Sooyoung’s ear, which she ignored.

“Your friend is always invited,” Doyoung replied. “I would like to meet the young woman that has been beside you since you were a girl.”

Sooyoung smiled once more. She turned around and let herself be guided back inside by her aunt. 

Doyoung went back inside shortly after. Taeyong found him almost immediately.

“She’s very kind,” Doyoung said, surprising Taeyong. “Please have the florist prepare a bouquet for Lady Sooyoung.” 

Doyoung listed off the flowers that Sooyoung liked and Taeyong jotted them down, promising that Lady Sooyoung would receive the bouquet in a few days. 

“And what else?”

Taeyong cleared his throat. “Her Majesty would like to meet with you to discuss the upcoming meeting.”

* * *

There were ninety of them in total. Doyoung had never gotten confirmation about how many there were but now that they were all in front of him in an orderly fashion, he could count them. Nine per row and ten rows―ninety people. Ninety prisoners. And among them, Mark.

Doyoung was a bit miffed. He’d gone to confess before The Mother a few days ago. He’d gone through the tradition, saying the prayers and going through the actions, hands clasped together and on his knees, words spilling from his lips in a way they never had before. 

He knew that it was wrong to want something he couldn’t have. Especially this. Especially Mark. Doyoung still didn’t know if it was Mark he wanted or if he had only been attracted by the omega qualities Mark had. Still, Doyoung was repulsed by himself. His body betrayed him and his actions were shameful. Each time he looked at his hands, he was reminded that he would not be treated nicely by The Mother. 

“Do you remember what you’re to do?” Mother asked.

“Yes,” Doyoung answered. 

Among the prisoners, there were about seventy omegas. The rest of them were betas and while not ideal, it was still possible to take one. Doyoung didn’t have to look through each one because he knew who he would choose already. It was only a matter of finding him within the crowd. 

A soldier came and escorted Doyoung down the stairs and to the floor of the courtyard. He walked to the center and then he was told he could walk around the group. The soldier told him that could ask people to step out but he wasn’t allowed to say anything else to them.

Doyoung nodded and began looking. He spotted a girl who couldn’t be any older than fifteen years old and his heart shattered. There were bruises and cuts all over her arms and her torn clothes were stained brown. Doyoung wondered if it was dirt, wary of how dangerously close it looked to dried blood. He saw a man who looked like he could barely stand, his skinny limbs being pulled down by the metal cuffs around his wrists. The man looked like he could be as old as Doyoung’s grandfather.

Doyoung walked around, aware of how long he was taking.

And then he saw him.

“Him,” Doyoung said. He surprised the soldier beside him as he raised a finger and pointed to a young man who stood in the third line. “Tell him to step forward.”

Doyoung watched as the soldier shoved the people in the first two lines to reach the third line. Several of them fell, including the girl and man he had seen earlier, and Doyoung felt disgust build up in his throat as he watched the soldiers make no effort to help them up. He restrained himself from going and helping himself because he knew he wasn’t supposed to interact with them more than necessary. 

The soldier that had pushed through took a key and unlocked the cuffs of the young man Doyoung had pointed to. He grabbed his wrist and pulled him forcefully. The man pulled back, a defiant look on his face. Doyoung watched him say something he couldn’t hear. The soldier only tightened his grip on his wrist and pulled him forward. Doyoung studied the man before him.

He hadn’t seen Mark in days. Not since his visit to the family cemetery. And now, Doyoung could see him well. He was just a bit shorter than Doyoung. Mark’s hair was a dark shade of brown, almost black. His face was dirty and there were several bruises on his face and collarbones, something that hadn’t been there before, which did concern Doyoung. He wanted to reach out and touch the fading marks tenderly, but he held himself back. 

Doyoung’s eyes flitted down to Mark’s wrists, where the soldier had held him. He saw that they were chafed from the metal cuffs that were no doubt wrapped tight around his wrist, the skin red and small cuts from where the metal had dug into his skin.

Did it hurt Doyoung to see him this way? Perhaps. But given how Mark had damned Doyoung, he had to push aside his feelings. He couldn’t allow this deep and strong desire to take over. Not when he was going to do something like this.

“You’re going to suffer,” Mark said quietly.

Doyoung was surprised he had spoken. He barely resisted the temptation to reply.

“You and your entire family are going to suffer,” he said angrily, lips pulled down into a scowl and eyes filled with fury.

Doyoung disregarded him and only turned to the soldier. “This one,” he said as he tried to sound confident and emotionless as if he was unaffected by the words of the man. The words had hit Doyoung hard. No one had ever spoken to him in such a vile manner. “Take him.”

As he was dragged away, Doyoung took a deep breath, bringing a hand to his chest. He was led back up and escorted out. Taeyong took him by the arm and began to speak but his words fell on deaf ears. Doyoung looked over his shoulder, barely catching a glimpse of the blue sky and the dozens of prisoners below. Among them, Mark, who he had chosen.

Doyoung’s long-awaited engagement was to be announced soon. Taeyong had taken Doyoung’s final choice and let Mother know. The preparations for the engagement announcement had begun earnestly. Doyoung would marry a princess from a kingdom far away. He had spoken to her briefly and out of all of those people he’d met, she had seemed to be the best. Her admiration for him was great and he was sure he would be able to take care of her.

A beautiful omega to accompany him in his life. Someone dainty, graceful, and precious. She was perfect. They would have no issue in bringing a wonderful heir to the kingdom. Doyoung would take his place as king eventually and his wife would be beside him. And their children would also be taken care of.

And as forbidden as Mark was, Doyoung wasn’t strong enough to keep him away.

* * *

Doyoung managed to find Mark through questioning a few people. They would talk, he knew that, but he found he didn’t care much what they thought. If word got to Mother, he would brush it off. People at the palace talked nonsense. He would never seek out a palace worker, much less one that also doubled as a prisoner.

From what Doyoung had learned, Mark was from the Hado region. He’d lost his parents young and his older brother had gone when he was an adolescent. He was alone for the most part. He kept to himself.

In Hado, Mark had done some unlawful activities. What they could be, Doyoung didn’t know, but he was aware that it was the reason why Mark had ended up here in such poor condition.

There was little else to know about him besides that.

Doyoung waited, avoiding meeting eyes with anyone else that passed. He found that the conditions of the grounds where the prisoners resided weren’t the best and he wondered if he’d be able to help. Mother was not opposed to it, he assumed, given how these people still worked and took care of the palace grounds. Not to mention, it might give Doyoung some credibility.

But would Mark trust him? If Doyoung did one good thing, would he be able to get to Mark? Possibly not.

It was made evident when Mark finally appeared and the moment he spotted Doyoung, he tried to rush by. Doyoung took him by the wrist, pulling him aside.

“Mark,” he said.

“Let go,” Mark hissed, pulling his arm back. “What?”

“I came to find you,” Doyoung began. “I have to confess something to you.”

“You have nothing you need to say to me, Your Highness,” Mark sneered. He looked over his shoulder. There was no one around. Mark met his eyes again. Doyoung could see the anger in them. “You have to leave.”

“I won’t leave until I explain,” Doyoung said. He didn’t reach out to touch Mark. He could smell the distress Mark was giving off and as much as Doyoung wanted to comfort him, he kept his arms at his sides. “I have to explain this to you.”

“Explain?” Mark huffed and crossed his arms. “You and your family have done nothing but make my life worse. First, you kill my parents and then you take my brother. What more could you want?”

Doyoung paused. “I―”

“The kingdom that you so happily represent is nothing. You and your family have done nothing to protect us. You leave us out there to die and when you finally capture us, you bring us here and make us work for you?” Mark was getting more upset and Doyoung wasn’t sure what to do. If Mark tried to hurt him, Doyoung had no choice but to get him down. “What do you make me do? You pick me to raise your future kids? You strip me of my liberties and individuality, and for what? Do you have some selfish need, Your Highness? A selfish desire, for an omega like me? What is it that your future spouse can’t fulfill that you had to pick me?”

Mark raised his hand and Doyoung grabbed him by the wrist. It was reminiscent of the other time Mark had tried to touch Doyoung. But this time wasn’t as gentle. Mark had tears in his eyes and Doyoung couldn’t begin to comprehend what was happening.

“I hate you and I hate people like you,” Mark said through gritted teeth. The tears continued to slide down his cheeks and Doyoung watched in awe. There was no other way to explain it. “The Mother has no pity for people like you when you die, Your Highness.”

Finally, Doyoung was able to pull himself together. As much as he’d learned how to control himself, Doyoung couldn’t help it. He pushed Mark back until he was against the door. There was no one around but they were outside. If anyone happened to see them in this position, Doyoung wasn’t sure how he would begin to explain himself. But none of that mattered now.

“You think you hate me?” Doyoung asked, his voice low. Mark gasped, choking on a sob, and his eyes looked over Doyoung’s face. There was some fear but more than that, Mark seemed… interested. Doyoung huffed out a small laugh. “I know I’m damned. I’ve never had much faith and that alone is cause for damnation after death.”

Doyoung wasn’t sure if he should continue. He’d come to find Mark and explain. He wouldn’t confess to what he’d done with Mark’s voice and face in mind. If Mark claimed he hated Doyoung now, that hatred would only double after.

“Should I have saved you?” Doyoung held onto Mark’s wrist a little tighter, seeing how he winced a bit. “I don’t have the answer to that, but you, Mark, are great cause for my newfound damnation.”

He should hate Mark. Doyoung should feel the hot rage within him. Mark had cursed at him. Mark had disrespected him. But Mark had also been the person in Doyoung’s dreams from the last weeks. Night after night, it was Mark who played in his mind. Doyoung had said his name under his breath more than he could count, more than was reasonable. He had imagined the most sinful of things with Mark as a participant in them. 

“You think you hate me?” Doyoung repeated. He let go of Mark, taking a step back. Mark took some deep breaths and Doyoung chuckled, half-satisfied with the reaction. “I’ve done enough hating of myself to last me a lifetime. Spare me the curses. I’ll take my leave.”

Before Doyoung could turn, Mark grabbed the front of his coat and pulled. Their lips met with such force, Doyoung felt the pain across his teeth. The way Mark’s hands gripped at the fabric was desperate and then Doyoung felt them make their way up, slowly wrapping around his neck.

Doyoung reacted quickly, his hands grabbing onto Mark’s waist. He had noticed how thin his waist was before but holding him like this was something different. Doyoung pressed their bodies together, turning his head so their noses didn’t bump. He pushed Mark back again, his back against the door.

It was more dangerous now.

Doyoung wouldn’t be able to come back from this.

He wasn’t sure he wanted to.

* * *

The feeling wouldn’t leave him. Doyoung had prayed over and over. He’d washed his body countless times, trying to rid himself of the sensation but it had failed. He wouldn’t be able to get rid of this. He feared he’d spend his entire life feeling this way.

The way Mark’s body had pressed against his. The intoxicating scent of his strengthening as they got closer, closer, closer, _too_ close. The taste of his lips, something sweet on his tongue, just asking Doyoung to partake…

He wanted more and that was an issue. Doyoung couldn’t have more. He could not have Mark and for that, he hated them both. He hated himself for wanting Mark at all. He hated himself for not being strong enough to control himself.

And he hated Mark for being so…

_Mother of Fire, take pity on me, a sinner._

Doyoung couldn’t think about Mark anymore. More than anything, Mark hated Doyoung.

“You have to go,” Mark had said. There was disdain in his tone and Doyoung was confused. “Leave!”

He’d left Mark. He hadn’t sought him out since. It didn’t take away from the growing lust within Doyoung. It was wrong. It was wrong. It was wrong.

Doyoung would be married next year to a beautiful omega. He would have beautiful children. He had money, land, and a future crown. He’d have it all in his grasp. And somehow, _all_ still included Mark.

He couldn’t betray the woman he was to marry. It’d be weeks before they met again and Doyoung had to remain loyal. He had promised Mother he would do it. He would be responsible. Donghyun wasn’t here anymore. Everything fell onto Doyoung’s shoulders now.

He’d cried. Doyoung had cursed.

A few days ago, he’d visited his brother again and he had cried right there. He cursed at the headstone and then he cursed at the sky. Why did it have to be Donghyun? Why did all of the burden have to fall onto Doyoung’s shoulders?

If he were still here, Doyoung would be free. And this was a dangerous thought to have but Doyoung allowed it anyway: he could have Mark. Maybe he wouldn’t have been able to have Mark openly but he could have treasured him in secret.

Imagining only made it worse. Trying to picture Mark sprawled out before him, waiting and wanting, was something Doyoung couldn’t do.

It made Doyoung hate them both even more.

Taeyong had picked up on Doyoung’s mood, pointing out his behavior. Doyoung was responding to his jests less now, not even acknowledging them anymore. He followed Taeyong’s words down to the letter, busying himself with all the responsibilities he had to bear. He declined any offers for free time.

“Are you unwell?” Taeyong finally asked one day.

“I’m very well,” Doyoung answered. He set aside some papers he’d been tasked with reading. “You’re imagining things.”

“I’m not,” Taeyong said. “Your scent betrays you.”

“My scent says nothing about my well-being,” Doyoung murmured. He offered a new stack of papers to Taeyong. “For Mother.”

Taeyong took the papers but didn’t leave. He took a seat across Doyoung. “It really does, Doyoung,” he insisted. “Perhaps it’s the change in season.”

“I’m _fine_.” Doyoung stared at Taeyong. “Make the preparations to go to Toka as soon as possible. Yuta and I agreed to meet for something.”

“Yuta?” Taeyong asked. “His Royal Highness?”

“Is there an issue, Taeyong?”

“Not at all,” Taeyong said. He stood and gathered all the papers. “I’ll make the preparations as quickly as I can and send word to Toka.”

“Very well. Go.”

Taeyong paused. “I heard a thing or two about you, Doyoung.”

Doyoung froze for a moment but quickly relaxed, hoping that Taeyong hadn’t caught onto his reaction. “What have you heard?”

There was no telling if someone had seen them. Even if they hadn’t seen Doyoung and Mark together, if they had even caught sight of Doyoung leaving, it would be enough to send rumors spiraling. How shameful it would be if Doyoung was caught mingling with someone on Mark’s level.

“I tell you your scent betrays you. It’s confirmation enough.” Taeyong clicked his tongue. “Don’t do anything else, Doyoung. For your own sake.”

It wasn’t enough for Doyoung to know if Taeyong knew. 

“I’ve done nothing wrong,” Doyoung said carefully.

“Sure.” Taeyong walked to the door but stopped before stepping out, giving Doyoung a glance over his shoulder. “Pray, Doyoung. I know you don’t believe much but it doesn’t hurt.”

If only Taeyong knew.

* * *

“I hate you,” Mark whispered. “I hate people like you.”

Doyoung laughed against Mark’s lips. “You said that already,” he replied. He kissed Mark once, twice. Mark turned away and Doyoung’s third kiss was against his jaw. “Is that why you’re here?”

Mark had been the one to find Doyoung. It had taken him by surprise. After seeing Mark in tears and being cursed at, Doyoung didn’t expect him to be the first to break. Mark approaching him was the last thing he would’ve bet on.

“I came across you by accident,” Mark answered, keeping his face turned away. Doyoung stared at his side profile, taking in the curve of Mark’s nose, the plumpness of his lips after they’d kissed for some minutes. “It wasn’t on purpose.”

“Tell yourself what you need to.” Doyoung let Mark go. “If that’s the case, go.”

This made Mark return his attention to Doyoung, surprise was written across his face. “Go?”

“You don’t want this, do you?”

“We―”

“Go, Mark.”

Mark reached for Doyoung’s hands. “If I looked for you on purpose, I’d never admit it,” he said quickly. Doyoung interlocked their fingers. It was an unfamiliar feeling. “And if I want to kiss you again, I’ll never let a soul know.”

Doyoung let go of Mark’s hands and grabbed his face. “That makes two of us,” he murmured, closing the space between them again.

Mark tasted sweet and his scent was even sweeter.

Doyoung’s lips moved from Mark’s mouth to his jaw, kissing from his chin to underneath his ear. He found a spot just behind Mark’s ear and licked his tongue over it before closing his lips around it and sucking. Mark jumped, his hands clutching onto Doyoung’s clothes and a breathy gasp escaping him.

“A-ah!”

Mark pushed himself closer and Doyoung moved his mouth lower. It was close to the area on Mark’s neck that would give him the most pleasure. And as tempting as it was to bite down and have Mark give in completely, Doyoung knew it would be wrong.

He stopped and stepped away from Mark, panting. He took Mark by the shoulders and held him at a distance, turning his gaze down to the ground between them. They were amongst the trees that surrounded the grounds, just meters away from the last of the headstones of Doyoung’s deceased family members. 

“Don’t look for me again,” Doyoung managed to say. It was reckless of Doyoung. He’d been warned not to see Mark again. “Let’s end it here.”

“End what?” Mark asked.

Doyoung looked up and only wanted to kiss Mark again. The shine of the saliva on his red, swollen lips was enticing. The dazed look in his eyes was magnificent. What a pretty omega, Doyoung thought.

“This,” Doyoung said. “Whatever this is.”

“It was never anything, to begin with,” Mark said.

“Then it won’t be an issue,” Doyoung replied.

He let go of Mark’s shoulders and straightened up, wiping his hands on his coat. He remembered the faint scars on his palms, remembered how he’d given in one too many times already. These hands had already held Mark and had memorized the feeling of him. Doyoung willed the feelings aside.

“I’m announcing my engagement in two nights. I’ve betrayed my future wife enough.” Doyoung swallowed the knot forming in his throat. “I won’t look for you again.”

Mark said nothing and Doyoung took it as his acceptance. He turned and began to walk away, the sound of breaking branches underneath his shoes filling the dreadful silence. Doyoung didn’t know if he had wanted Mark to reject it. Mark had no say in this. The decision was made.

“The second floor, the same room, Your Highness,” Mark said loudly. Doyoung stopped walking, his breath catching in his throat. He waited a minute. “I told you I hate you.” 

Doyoung wouldn’t go looking for Mark.

* * *

The announcement of Doyoung’s engagement was taken well by those in the palace. His future wife wasn’t here but the celebration would go on. In another kingdom, they were also celebrating without him. By the end of the week, the news would be everywhere. 

The drinks flowed freely and the food prepared was delicious. People ate and drank, causing a ruckus at the long dining table. Doyoung received slaps on the back and loud congratulations with several toasts in his name. He appreciated the thanks and whenever he was offered a drink, he took it.

After tonight, the preparations for the wedding would begin.

Despite the celebration, Doyoung couldn’t help but feel like it was the beginning of something else. It was the beginning of the end, he concluded. This was it. By next year, he’d be married and one step closer to fulfilling his duty for his kingdom. Mother was pleased. The other members of the royal court were satisfied. But Doyoung wasn’t.

And because he wasn’t, Doyoung drank. He drank until he could no longer think straight. Once the dinner ended and the party moved to the ballroom, Doyoung let himself go. He danced with everyone, the faces in front of him blurring into one another. The congratulations he received were slurred in his mind and he was sure his responses were the same. 

He laughed loudly as he took Mother to dance. It had been years since he’d been this free from his responsibilities. It was the beginning of the end, he reminded himself. He deserved one last night to enjoy himself completely.

When he got tired of dancing, Mother was taken by another gentleman and he stumbled to the side of the ballroom, holding onto the pillars for support. He admired the dancing. It was unlike the previous ball. He knew this kind of dancing. Very traditional and simple but still enjoyable.

He wasn’t sure how long he admired everyone for but he was pulled away by a sudden commotion behind him. He turned, catching two maids speaking to each other in hushed tones. By their expressions, something was wrong.

Doyoung stumbled over and they turned in his direction immediately, curtsying and bowing their heads.

“What is the matter?” Doyoung asked.

One of them shook her head but the other answered. “Your Highness, there’s been an issue with someone but it’s being taken care of.”

“An issue?” Doyoung narrowed his eyes. “Where?”

“Second floor, in―”

“Eunji!” the other interrupted.

Second floor, same room, Mark’s voice sounded off in Doyoung’s head. Mark, he thought. Something was wrong with Mark.

“Excuse me, ladies,” Doyoung said, his words slurring together. He nodded his head and stepped away, trying his best not to trip.

He didn’t like being drunk. It was an awful feeling afterward and Taeyong also didn’t like it since it meant Doyoung couldn’t take care of his responsibilities. But more than that, Doyoung lost all sense of control.

He stumbled out of the ballroom, undetected by anyone, and he climbed the stairs, holding onto the railing tightly and pulling himself up when he felt his legs would give out.

There was no one around at this hour. With the celebration, everyone was working downstairs. All hands available were taking care of the event. This meant that Doyoung was able to move freely down the hall of the second floor. He found Mark’s door easily and pushed it open.

The moment he did, he was hit with the same smell from before. Just like the day Doyoung had found Mark.

He heard a loud groan and he closed the door, stumbling across the room and into the area with the bed. Mark was on the bed, tossing and turning.

“Mark,” Doyoung breathed out.

“Ahh,” Mark exhaled. He lifted his head enough to see Doyoung. “Y-your Highness.”

Doyoung was frozen. Mark was… in heat? Could it happen so close to his last one? Was this possible?

His mind wouldn’t allow him a clear thought and when Mark whined, Doyoung moved. He walked to the side of the bed, his hand hovering over Mark.

“Touch me,” Mark cried. “Please, please.”

“I―” Doyoung inhaled deeply and felt dizzy when he took in all of Mark’s pheromones. “Mark, I can’t do that. I’ll get the―”

“Please,” Mark whispered, grabbing Doyoung’s hand. “It has to be you.”

It had to be Doyoung?

Mark tugged on Doyoung’s hand and when he was close enough, his hand moved to the back of Doyoung’s neck. Mark pulled him in, kissing him. It was messy and Doyoung tried to push Mark away. This wasn’t right. Just two days ago, he had told Mark they had to end it.

He wasn’t sure what this had become but Doyoung couldn’t let it continue, not only for his own sake but for Mark’s as well.

“Kiss me,” Mark begged.

If Mark was like this, hot and crying out for Doyoung, it was hard to resist. He was the perfect image of temptation, Doyoung thought. If there was anything to avoid, it was this. He couldn’t fall into the lustful trap Mark had set. But Doyoung had been damned from the start.

Mark’s scent combined with the drunken haze of his mind made Doyoung lose control of himself. He kissed Mark with everything he had. If Doyoung only had this one night left, he would allow himself to enjoy it completely.

Maybe if he had this, he’d be able to forget about Mark. He could move on from this lust and spend the rest of his life asking for pity from The Mother. He’d live the rest of his life with the scars if it meant they got to have Mark underneath for just a moment.

Mark’s skin was hot as Doyoung’s hand slid underneath the long shirt he wore. It was a thin shirt and it stuck to his sweaty body. Doyoung could feel the stickiness of the sweat beneath his fingertips.

He climbed onto the bed and straddled Mark. Carefully, Doyoung pulled up the gown, revealing Mark’s bare skin. Beneath him, Mark gasped. Doyoung traced along his sides, enjoying how Mark shivered. He moved up and circled Mark’s nipples, brushing his thumb over them. Mark whined and arched his back, his hands grasping at the sheets on either side of him.

The perfect image of temptation, Doyoung repeated. 

He took off his coat, tossing it to the side, and fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. It took a while but once he was able to pull off his shirt, he tossed it aside as well. Doyoung moved to his belt, unclasping it and pulling it out. He unbuttoned his pants and got off of Mark, rolling to lay beside him as he kicked them off.

“Y-your―”

“Doyoung. Call me Doyoung.”

Before Mark could even try it out, Doyoung kissed him. He propped himself up on his forearm and leaned over Mark, his other hand holding his face in place. Mark responded needily and Doyoung wondered if this is what it really felt to be with an omega in heat. He wondered how he had managed to avoid such a situation until now. 

_Mother of Fire, take pity on us sinners._

Doyoung wouldn’t be pure for his future wife but she was the last thing on his mind at the moment. Right now, his mind was filled with the sweetness of vanilla and chamomile. Mark and only Mark.

Mark pulled back first. “Do―a-ah, Doyoung,” he cried out. “I, I…”

Doyoung had never done this before. His mind was going wild and the fact that he wasn’t sober didn’t help. He pressed his hand to Mark’s bare chest, running down his hot skin and stopping at his navel.

Mark was thin. His broad shoulders slimmed down to a thinner waist. Doyoung lifted his hand and pressed only his fingers down, just by Mark’s belly button. Mark jolted, a breathy moan escaping him.

Wonderful, Doyoung thought. He pulled back and pushed himself up. Mark was gasping for breath and Doyoung took a moment to try and pull himself together.

“Like this,” Mark managed to say, taking Doyoung by the wrist and leading his hand down. “There.”

Doyoung’s hand hovered over Mark’s pelvis, still covered by the thick blankets. Carefully, Doyoung pushed the blankets down and inhaled sharply when Mark’s cock curved up, red and dripping precome. 

Doyoung wrapped his hand around Mark’s cock, thumbing over the head. Mark gasped loudly, hips thrusting up. It was one thing to do it to himself and another to do it to someone else. Still, Doyoung slowly began to stroke Mark’s cock, using the precome to make it easier.

As he pumped Mark with one hand, he used the other to do himself. He was hard already but he wanted to match Mark’s pleasure. He knelt beside Mark, keeping his legs spread to allow him to move. He nearly fell over as the tension in his navel built up.

Mark came first, hot and all over Doyoung’s hand. He was panting, gasping for air, and he wriggled on the bed as Doyoung continued to jerk him off through his orgasm. Doyoung stopped stroking himself and focused on Mark, wiping his dirty hand on the sheets so he could push back Mark’s hair. 

He leaned down and kissed Mark, swallowing his moans.

“Ah… ah, I want you,” Mark murmured against Doyoung’s lips.

“I want you,” Doyoung repeated. He let go of Mark’s cock and backed away. He was unsure of what to do next. It was humiliating.

“Here,” Mark said, taking Doyoung’s hand again. He directed Doyoung lower, lifting one of his legs. “There.”

Carefully, Doyoung began to touch. Mark jumped and his hands clutched onto one of Doyoung’s arms. His gasps encouraged Doyoung to touch more. Doyoung knew he needed to be careful so he moved slowly.

Besides their heavy breathing, there was silence. Doyoung used the noises Mark made as signals. When he pressed a finger to Mark’s entrance, he received a sigh and Mark relaxed. It wasn’t long before Doyoung was fingering Mark, slowly pushing one finger in and out. Mark used the opportunity to kiss Doyoung wherever he could reach. He kissed across Doyoung’s chest, also nipping and sucking. Doyoung was barely holding himself up.

As Doyoung added more fingers, he also began to kiss Mark back, sucking at his collarbones and biting down enough to make Mark cry out. The sound was nothing like what he had heard in his dreams but it was just as pleasant to Doyoung’s ears. 

Doyoung also began to stroke himself again, knowing that he would be able to fuck Mark soon. He got hard quickly, his body betraying him yet again.

“There, there,” Mark panted. “Let me turn around.”

Doyoung pulled his fingers out of Mark, feeling the sticky slick that came out. He cleaned his fingers off on the sheets and pushed himself up into a kneeling position. Mark situated himself on his hands and knees.

For a moment, Doyoung stared. He admired the curve of Mark’s back, seeing the bumps of his spine. Beautiful, he thought.

He adjusted himself behind Mark, taking him by his waist with one hand and moving closer. He took his cock in the other hand, pressing against Mark a few times. Mark let out some sharp breaths.

Doyoung teased once, twice, and then finally pushed all the way in. Mark squeezed around Doyoung’s cock and Doyoung groaned, falling over Mark’s back. He panted across Mark’s neck and then kissed at the skin there, sucking hard.

“Mark,” he whispered against his skin.

Mark hummed.

“You’ve really damned me this time.”

With that, Doyoung began to move. His dreams proved to be unrealistic. The real thing was much better. Fucking into Mark was unlike anything he could ever imagine. The sounds Mark made were unbelievable and in his hazy state of mind, Doyoung took it all in, never wanting it to end.

He thrust into Mark harder and faster, fueled by these beautiful sounds. And the sound of skin against skin combined with the moans and gasps only added to the feeling.

This was it, Doyoung thought. Mark, Mark, Mark.

This omega was made for Doyoung. This omega was meant to be taken by Doyoung. Perhaps he had known it from the start. From the moment he had held Mark in his hands or from the moment he had met Mark’s eyes properly. 

Mark was his to keep. Mark was his to love. Mark was his to _adore_.

Doyoung reached around Mark’s body and took his cock, stroking Mark in rhythm with his thrusts. Mark dropped down onto his forearms, crying out loudly. It was a beautiful sound and it was only meant for Doyoung to hear.

He cursed as he felt the pressure by his navel. “Mark,” he grunted, face pressed against Mark’s spine. “I’m going to stop.”

Doyoung saw Mark shake his head. “No,” he managed to say in between his heavy breaths. “I―I need you to knot me. Knot me. Please, _knot_ me.”

The desperation in Mark’s voice caught Doyoung by surprise and his hips stuttered. He felt his knot begin to swell and by the time Doyoung tried to pull out, it was too late. If he forced the knot out, Mark would get hurt. And there was no fighting his instincts. Doyoung pushed his hips against Mark’s ass as much as he could as his knot swelled and he came. 

He was gasping. He let go of Mark’s cock to hold onto his waist, keeping Mark in place. Mark’s face was buried against the sheets now and Doyoung could hear him crying.

“M-Mark,” Doyoung managed to say.

“‘M fine,” Mark breathed out, turning his head to the side. Doyoung could see the bliss in his expression, eyes nearly glazed over in pure satisfaction and a bit of drool hanging from his lips. “Jus’ feels so good. Mhm, alpha.”

Doyoung felt more come and he pushed himself into Mark again, eliciting another moan from Mark. 

“Bite me,” Mark said. “Do it. Let me be yours.”

Mark was Doyoung’s. With that, Doyoung leaned in, finding the spot at the junction of Mark’s shoulder and neck. Without a moment of hesitation, Doyoung bit down.

* * *

Doyoung had made a mess of everything. He had never asked for forgiveness and accepted this much. It was like he was permanently glued in this position. For hours each day, Doyoung cried out for forgiveness.

The news had reached him through Taeyong.

“The young man you found,” he had started a few days ago. It was a bit random and it had taken Doyoung back. “Something has happened to him.”

“What?” Doyoung asked. He couldn’t appear too curious so he went on with what he was doing, feigning some disinterest. “He’s hurt again?”

“No,” Taeyong said, his face a bit unsure. “He’s very well.”

“Then?”

It had to be something bad. Taeyong would not be evasive otherwise. Doyoung prepared himself for the worst. It had been nearly a month and a half since that night. Doyoung’s engagement had been announced to the entire kingdom weeks ago. Celebrations had taken place and the wedding planning had begun.

But if something had happened to Mark…

“The doctor found that he’s pregnant,” Taeyong finally said.

Doyoung nearly choked on the deep breath he took. Taeyong had panicked, getting him some water. Doyoung coughed after he took a few sips.

“He’s what?”

“We’re not sure how or who,” Taeyong confessed, sitting across from Doyoung. He looked at a loss for words. “And he won’t say either. He’s marked as well.”

Doyoung wanted to confess then and there. It was him. It had to be him. Because after that first time, Doyoung had fucked two more times, knotting him both times. He had put the mark on him as well. He had claimed Mark for himself, drunkenly and selfishly. Doyoung knew that he would have to tell the truth at some point. He could only go so long without seeing Mark and likewise, Mark would only be able to stay away from Doyoung for a certain amount of time before it became painful.

_Mother of Fire, take pity on us sinners._

He looked at his hands. He had taken Mark as his own. With these scarred hands, Doyoung had held Mark. He had taken what he should’ve never had. Something forbidden.

“How long?” Doyoung asked, not taking his eyes away from his hands.

“Nearly two months,” Taeyong replied. “Her Majesty will take care of it. If you were married and had a child on the way, it’d be no issue but like this, the young man might be unavailable to complete his job for you and your wife when the time comes.”

“Take care of it how?”

And Taeyong had answered just as Doyoung thought he would.

They couldn’t make Mark go through with anything. Doyoung would make sure of it. Even if he never confessed, the child that Mark had inside him was his. Or maybe it wasn’t. Mark’s heat had lasted days and Doyoung had only been with him during that one night. He doubted Mark had been bedded by anyone else during that time. No one would touch an omega that was claimed that way.

But besides that, some part of Doyoung desperately hoped that it really was his child inside Mark. If it was… if Mark had his child…

“Leave him,” Doyoung had told Taeyong. “I’ll speak with Mother.”

Approaching Mother had been difficult. She was busier these days. Apart from the kingdom work, she was taken by preparations for the wedding. Doyoung hadn’t even spared much thought to it. Whenever he was presented with options, he had Taeyong decide what he thought suited best and wrote it off.

“Mother, Taeyong has told me what has happened with the nursemaid I’ve chosen,” Doyoung said to her one afternoon over tea.

“Ah, yes,” she replied. She waved her hand. “No worries. I’ll take care of it. The boy will not cause any unnecessary trouble for you and Sejeong.”

“It’s no trouble, Mother,” Doyoung said calmly. “If anything, isn’t it a positive? The sooner his body gets used to it, the easier it will be when the time comes for us.”

She looked a bit concerned. “Well now, Doyoung, how unlike you to worry about the help, especially someone who’s not even hired help. Are you protecting him because of how you found him?”

“I don’t think this counts as protecting him.” Doyoung didn’t like to use Donghyun as an excuse in conversations with his mother but he had no choice. “Wouldn’t Donghyun do the same thing?”

Mother paused, a bit surprised. She collected herself after a moment. “You’re right,” she said. “Donghyun would. In that case, the boy shall remain. Doctor Jung will check on him throughout the next months.”

“Thank you, Mother.”

She smiled and waved him off. “It’s the least we can do for him.” She huffed out a sarcastic laugh. “If the bastard that did it to him won’t take responsibility… that young man is very lucky to have someone like you on his side, dear.”

And it tore Doyoung apart. 

Doyoung had to find a way to see Mark. It had been nearly two months and he had to make sure he was all right. If Mark was hurt, if Mark was still working… he couldn’t be putting himself in danger. Doyoung wouldn’t allow it. He’d done enough and if Mark suffered, Doyoung would never be able to forgive himself.

_Mother of Fire, guide me through this. I haven’t been the best of followers but I ask this of you now, as a father._

Father. Doyoung never thought he’d be one in this way. Father had passed long before Donghyun had. Doyoung didn’t have many memories with him. If he tried, he could remember his face sometimes but most days, it escaped him. It had always been Mother who was with them.

The absence of a father figure in Doyoung’s life couldn’t be helped. Mother had loved Father with all her heart and even now, it belonged to him. She wouldn’t remarry in this life, she’d said many times before. But the absence of a father figure in the life of Doyoung’s child could be helped. If Doyoung never confessed to it, at least he would still have Mark and their child close.

What had he done?

Doyoung sighed, standing up from his spot on the floor. He carefully closed the book that had once belonged to Donghyun and set it aside. It was only midday and Taeyong would come in soon to let Doyoung know lunch was ready.

There were some plans for the afternoon. Doyoung’s bride-to-be would be departing from her kingdom in a few weeks and there was much to prepare for her arrival. Doyoung would have to give his input on those superficial things as well as manage his responsibilities as Crown Prince. There was so little time that he could have to himself now.

The beginning of the end, Doyoung thought. He remembered having that thought on the night of the engagement announcement.

It left a bitter taste in his mouth.

* * *

It took nearly another month for Doyoung to be able to have time for himself.

The more time that passed, the more desperate he felt to go out and find Mark. According to Taeyong, he had stopped working and was resting more these days, only taking light jobs in the kitchen. He wasn’t much help, Doyoung heard, but he didn’t do any cooking or food preparation so there was little he could make a mess of.

It was a relief. Mother had taken Doyoung’s words to heart and asked Doctor Jung to come back to check on Mark. Taeyong informed Doyoung and despite his hesitation, he had allowed Doyoung to come and wait outside.

“I don’t see why you insist,” Taeyong said as they stood outside the door.

Doyoung shrugged his shoulders. “Does it matter?” he asked. He leaned against the wall, throwing his head against it. “I’m responsible for him.”

“ _You_ are not. I am,” Taeyong corrected. “You shouldn’t worry yourself with these kinds of issues, Doyoung. That is what I’m here to do. I take care of everything for you.”

“You know I can’t allow that,” Doyoung said, laughing a little bit. He’d never let Taeyong take complete control of the things in his life. This was no different. “He must get through this. I’ll make sure of that.”

Doyoung wanted Mark to have a healthy pregnancy but not for the reasons Taeyong, or anyone else for that matter, might think. He couldn’t imagine Mark with a swollen belly but to say the sight wasn’t something Doyoung didn’t want to say would be a lie. If Mark could just give birth to a healthy baby, Doyoung would be happy.

He wasn’t sure what he would do following the birth. Doyoung wouldn’t be able to see the child. In Mother’s original plan, the child would be taken away from Mark, but Doyoung had convinced her that it wouldn’t be good for Mark’s health to separate him from the baby. She agreed and eventually decided that Mark would be able to care for his child for some time. It bought Doyoung some time to think about how he could continue to protect Mark.

But as much as he wanted to keep Mark safe, a part of Doyoung was terrified. Would Mark blame him? At the moment, Mark had asked Doyoung to knot him but they hadn't had clear minds. Doyoung hadn’t been beside Mark for nearly three months. He’d gone through all this alone and while Mark had seemed strong, he was still a lone omega without the person who had marked him. It would hurt Mark more than it would hurt Doyoung.

Remembering the slight resentment Mark had towards him made him wonder if it would return. Doyoung would be hurt if Mark pushed aside the few moments they had and resumed with the harsh words but he would accept it. Doyoung had done wrong by Mark. He couldn’t change that for either of them.

If Mark didn’t want this, Doyoung couldn’t force him to go through with it. That was it.

“He’s still young,” Taeyong said, bringing Doyoung out of his thoughts. “From when we talked, he told me he was only twenty-three.”

“Twenty-three?” Doyoung asked. So he was only a few years younger than Doyoung. “But when I found him…”

“I tried to get as much information out of him as possible but he was adamant about giving any. He said it would hurt the people he cared about but he’s alone now, and in this kind of situation no less. You’d think if anyone cared for him, they would’ve stepped up and taken some responsibility for him.” Taeyong hummed and turned to Doyoung. He reached out and squeezed Doyoung’s bicep. “He should be thankful to you, Doyoung.”

“He was adamant, huh?”

There was much more to Mark than Doyoung could imagine. He knew that much but this only made him more curious. The Hado region where Mark came from was dangerous. It was where Donghyun had lost his life. Hundreds of others had lost their lives there, too. A wave of relief washed over Doyoung as he realized Mark had been one of those who made it out alive, and he had ended up here by chance.

“I suppose he’s been involved with unlawful activities there,” Taeyong offered after a moment. “Given how harsh his heat hit him earlier this year. It reminded me of the first one all omegas have. Whatever they gave him up there… it was no good.”

“You’re not saying—”

“It’s a surprise at all that he was able to get pregnant at all,” Taeyong said. “Whoever put him in this situation… they may have saved you from something disastrous.”

Doyoung didn’t get the opportunity to say anything more as the door opened and Doctor Jung and Jungwoo stepped out. Doctor Jung offered a calm smile and it was enough to get rid of some of the nervousness Doyoung felt.

“He’s doing well given the situation,” Doctor Jung said. “Definitely close three months now. I can safely say the child will be born at the start of next year if everything remains as it is right now.”

“Is there anything we can do for him?” Doyoung asked.

Doctor Jung gave him a look over. If there was anyone who would be able to figure it out, it would be him. Jungwoo could also figure it out. Both of them not only knew what there was to know about health but their observation and deduction skills were also impeccable.

“Maintain a healthy diet. Keep the work light.” Doctor Jung cleared his throat. “Your Highness, if I may…”

Doyoung looked at Taeyong. “Would you give us a moment?”

Taeyong nodded and stepped away. Doctor Jung had figured it out, Doyoung thought as the older man took Doyoung by the shoulder, letting out a heavy sigh.

“Your Highness, something has stuck out to me while I was looking over the young man. You were informed that the young man has been marked,” Doctor Jung started. Jungwoo remained by his side quietly but Doyoung could tell by the expression on his face that he had also figured it out. “I’ve treated you since you were a newborn. I helped Her Majesty through the period of time she carried you… It might be a bit much to say but I do believe I know you just as much as you know yourself. And I cannot help but ask—”

“No,” Doyoung interrupted. “Doctor, I sincerely appreciate the time you’ve taken from your day to check on him. I do not doubt the experience you have. You’ve served my family very well for many years but perhaps…”

“Ah.” Doctor Jung let Doyoung go. “You believe the age is getting to me now?”

Doyoung looked at Jungwoo. “Jungwoo here is not as experienced yet. I don’t mean to undermine your abilities, Jungwoo.”

“My observations are not flawless,” Jungwoo replied. He rocked on his heels for a moment. “I make mistakes.”

“Right,” Doyoung murmured. “Mistakes.”

“Your Highness, he will need more care as the pregnancy progresses. He will suffer if he’s left alone during this time. _You_ will suffer.”

“I’ll take care of it, Doctor.” Doyoung took a step back, clapping his hands together. He turned and motioned to Taeyong, who was at the end of the hall. “Taeyong will pay you for your time and experience.”

Doctor Jung left with a quiet goodbye. Jungwoo stayed behind for a moment.

“Hyung, is it… really?”

“Yes,” Doyoung whispered. He grabbed Jungwoo’s arm, pulling him in closer. “How were you able to tell?”

“Doctor Jung… he figured it out.” Jungwoo shrugged Doyoung’s hand off. “How did such a thing happen?”

“There’s no time to tell you,” Doyoung said. “When will you return for the next checkup?”

“In two months.”

Two months was too long. Doyoung sighed. “Very well,” he muttered. “He started his heat the night of the engagement announcement. Why did he have his heat so close to the last?”

Jungwoo blinked. “Well, because his cycle was thrown off. His body is learning to regulate the heats after not having gone through one in years. We expected one around that time but by the time we arrived, he was already halfway through it. He’d already been… well.”

“Years?”

“Jungwoo, we must go now!” Doctor Jung called out.

Jungwoo left. Taeyong led the doctor and Jungwoo out, leaving Doyoung behind. Doyoung turned his attention to the door and without hesitation, he pushed it open, closing it behind him.

He crossed the sitting room and entered the bedroom, finding Mark there. He was awake and his gaze drifted up to Doyoung as he entered.

“Your Highness,” Mark said, sounding surprised. Doyoung felt confused. He wasn’t sure what kind of reaction he had expected or wanted but it was not this. He didn’t expect Mark to sound so surprised. “What brings you here?”

“Mark, I—” Doyoung took a deep breath. The bedroom smelled sweet. “You’re…”

“Your Highness—”

“I told you to call me Doyoung.”

“Doyoung,” Mark said carefully, “You shouldn’t be here.”

Doyoung walked up to the bed. Mark had several pillows behind him, holding him up. The thick covers were pulled up to his chest and Doyoung was tempted to tug them down just to see if it was real but he stopped himself. He studied Mark’s face instead. He was a bit fuller and his cheeks were tinged a light shade of pink, the color blossoming on his ears and neck as well. He seemed well-rested, which was a relief, and there were no obvious injuries on his person.

“Thank The Mother, you’re all right,” Doyoung cried, taking both of Mark’s hands in his and dropping his head to the mattress. He felt the tears form and fall from his eyes onto the white sheets below. “Thank The Mother, you’re both all right.”

Mark tugged his hands out of Doyoung’s hold. Doyoung felt him begin to brush his fingers through Doyoung’s hair and it only made him cry more. Doyoung lifted his hand and covered his face with his hands.

“Why are you crying?”

“I’m sorry I put you in this situation,” Doyoung said. He pulled his hands from his face and looked at Mark through his tears. “And you had to be alone through this.”

“It takes two people to do this,” Mark said quietly. “I did miss you, though.”

“You did?” Doyoung wiped his eyes. He couldn’t believe he’d been brought to tears by this. It was embarrassing and Mark hadn’t even reacted to it. “Why?”

“Because it’s you,” Mark answered.

“It’s me,” Doyoung repeated. “It really is?”

Mark brought a hand to touch the spot above his right collarbone. “No one else.”

Doyoung pushed himself up and kissed Mark, realizing how much he’d missed the feeling. Even if they’d only kissed a few times, the feeling of Mark’s lips against Doyoung’s was burned into his memory. The feeling of Mark’s skin underneath Doyoung’s touch was forever something he’d know. Doyoung would give it all up for it to only be Mark for him.

* * *

“Cancel the trip to Toka. If Yuta can arrange to visit us, do it. Take whatever you need to cover the expenses.” Doyoung watched as Taeyong looked up at him in surprise. “I can’t leave now.”

“Doyoung, do you know how much—”

“I’m well aware of how much,” Doyoung interrupted. “Just do it.”

Spring would begin to turn into summer and Doyoung’s time would be taken by other things. Sejeong would be arriving soon and Doyoung would have to spend time with her. Mother was excited and most of the palace looked forward to it. Doyoung’s excitement had been lacking but he used the excuse of being too busy to cover it up.

Now more than ever, Mother had been giving him more responsibilities. It was almost never-ending and he knew that when he became king, it would be an even heavier workload. He almost cursed at Donghyun for dying and leaving behind this spot to fill.

Doyoung hadn’t though. He would accept his spot gracefully.

Yet there would always be a part of him that would never be satisfied with it.

If he could find a moment to see Mark, Doyoung would feel much better. He knew better than to ask Taeyong outright to schedule time out of his day to visit Mark and he didn’t want to use Donghyun as an excuse. He had to be more creative or get better at sneaking out.

Taeyong was also stressed. With the amount of work Doyoung could be, Taeyong’s dedication and resilience were very admirable. But if Doyoung could give Taeyong excuses to enjoy himself, maybe he’d be a bit more lenient when Doyoung caused trouble for him. 

Doyoung didn’t want to cause trouble but he knew it would be an issue. Meeting with Mark more than necessary was suspicious and while no one but Jungwoo and Doctor Jung had figured out that it was Doyoung, if Doyoung spent too much time around Mark, others would begin to pick up on it.

“You smell too much like him,” Taeyong commented a few days ago, wrinkling his nose in distaste. “I’ll set out something to get rid of the smell.”

Doyoung couldn’t refuse or Taeyong would be suspicious. It was true that Doyoung’s clothes smelled a lot like Mark. During the few times he could see Mark, Doyoung allowed him to scent his coats. It was comforting for both of them. 

The room that Mark stayed in now was filled with things Doyoung had scented in private so Mark wouldn’t feel all too alone in there.

He was nearly halfway through the pregnancy and he needed to take it even easier than before. Doyoung had taken care of everything as discreetly as he could. It no longer seemed like Mark had come as a prisoner. Mother had joked that he was taken care of more than the other members of the royal court. Mark’s work had dwindled to nothing and Doyoung had someone help Mark out in the way Taeyong helped him.

Most times, Mark remained in his rooms but on occasion, Doyoung saw him out in the gardens. His appearance was changing by the day. The swell of his belly was much more noticeable and the fullness in his face had increased, all healthy signs for Mark and the baby. Doyoung heard about the complaints about pain and aches through Taeyong but those were natural and as much as he wanted to comfort Mark himself, he knew that the person beside Mark was just as capable of helping him.

Doyoung knew he wouldn’t be able to keep up the charade much longer. Mother would eventually find out. Taeyong would notice soon. And when Sejeong came, Doyoung would have to give up certain things if he wanted to keep Mark safe.

Damn it all. If he saved them all the disappointment and owned up to it now, would it be that bad?

When Doyoung finished his plans for the day, he made his way to the chapel attached to the palace, finding a spot in a pew. The stained glass windows depicted images from the scriptures. The Mother of Fire and her three children were all in one window, welcoming and accepting everyone into their arms, taking up a large part of the chapel.

Doyoung hadn’t been in this place since they held Donghyun’s service. He looked around, a bit awed by everything.

“Your Highness.”

“Oh!” Doyoung jumped up and turned to the chapel entrance. “It’s you.”

Mark was accompanied by a younger man, Jeno if Doyoung recalled correctly.

“What brings you here?”

“We come to pray every day after lunch,” Mark said. He stepped into one of the pews in the back, Jeno taking his place beside him. “What brings you here?”

“I was just curious…”

“Do you pray?” Mark asked. There was no judgment.

“I’ve taken it up recently,” Doyoung admitted. He stepped out, thinking he’d come back later. He couldn’t do this kind of thing with Mark around. “I’ll leave you to it.”

As Doyoung approached the exit, Mark stopped him. “She forgives, Your Highness,” he said. Doyoung inhaled, just barely catching Mark’s scent. “No action is completely unforgivable.”

Doyoung turned on his heel, holding his hands behind his back. Mark was facing him but Jeno wasn’t. Good, Doyoung thought. “Thank you,” he said, nodding his head.

Mark smiled and turned back around.

Doyoung didn’t return to the chapel later in the day or for the rest of the week. Instead, he visited his brother, kneeling on the grass and bringing his hands together, holding the amulet in his hands.

She forgives, Doyoung repeated in his head. 

* * *

If The Mother forgave Doyoung, She had a sick way of showing it.

“Mark?” Doyoung asked, grabbing onto Taeyong’s forearm tightly. “Where is he? Taeyong, _where_ is he?”

“Doyoung, calm down.” Taeyong brought a hand over Doyoung’s. “Doctor Jung is taking care of him. Jungwoo is there, too. There’s no issue.”

“Taeyong,” Doyoung gasped, clutching at the front of Taeyong’s coat. He leaned in, close enough that he felt Taeyong’s hot breath fan over the lower half of his face. “Taeyong, I have to admit something to you.”

Could She not forgive him because he hadn’t confessed?

“Doyoung?”

“Taeyong, that child—” Doyoung was supposed to get married in four months. He couldn’t keep this to himself and marry Sejeong while knowing that the heir to the throne had already been born. “The child… is _mine_.”

Taeyong’s hand dropped from on top of Doyoung’s and then Doyoung was being pushed back. “What?” Taeyong asked in disbelief. His eyes were wide and there was fear in them. “Doyoung, _what_?”

“Taeyong, I cannot go through with all of this,” Doyoung said quickly. He looked toward the closed door. He pointed at it and turned back to Taeyong. “That is all my doing, Taeyong. All of it.”

Mark was supposed to have at least three more months. If Jeno hadn’t been there, Mark would have never been able to let anyone know. From what Doyoung had gathered, it’d started as simple pains but they’d gotten progressively worse over the day. And then there’d been blood.

Taeyong had called for the doctor immediately but had refrained from telling Doyoung until he arrived with Jungwoo. Doyoung had demanded to see Mark but Taeyong refused him the chance. It was dangerous for him to go in and now that Taeyong knew the truth, it made more sense to keep Doyoung away.

“Doyoung, the child that Mark has been carrying is yours?”

“I lied. I lied. I lied to you, to Mother, to my future wife,” Doyoung confessed. Taeyong was frozen in front of him and Doyoung wanted to shake him. If Taeyong was happy, Doyoung would accept it. If Taeyong was mad, Doyoung would accept it. Anything but this. “The night of the engagement announcement. That’s how we know.”

Taeyong was quiet for several minutes and then: “Oh, what a mess you’ve made Doyoung.”

Doyoung had known that all along. He wanted to tell Taeyong he knew he had made a mistake but was it really much of a mistake?

Taeyong would have to tell Mother and she wouldn’t be happy. Doyoung knew that Sejeong would be informed. Everything would fall apart. Not only had Doyoung lied this entire time, but he’d lied to protect someone who didn’t even belong here. If the news spread, and it would, Doyoung would be ruined.

“He can’t lose the baby, Taeyong,” Doyoung said quietly. “Not after all this time.”

Doyoung saw Taeyong swallow hard. He averted his gaze. “Doyoung, I hate to say this,” he began. Doyoung didn’t want to hear the rest of it. “For your sake, it would be better if he did.”

_Mother of Fire, take pity on us sinners._

* * *

The truth always came out.

“It’s a girl,” Taeyong murmured when he stepped out of the room. He avoided looking at Doyoung directly. His voice was cold and unlike the Taeyong that Doyoung knew. “Both are well.”

Doyoung cried, hands clasped together in the same way they had been thousands of times before.

* * *

“I cannot marry you,” Sejeong said. It had been a tense silence the entire morning. The news hadn’t spread as wildly as Doyoung thought but everyone involved was told privately at some point over the week. “Not in this way.”

“I understand,” Doyoung replied. In his ears, his voice sounded distant. He couldn’t even look at Sejeong. 

“It would’ve been nice,” she said. There was still kindness to her voice. “But if you’ve claimed someone else, I cannot interfere with that.”

“I understand,” Doyoung repeated.

He hadn’t spoken to Mother yet but he imagined it would be just as painful as this. If not, more painful. Because it was Mother. Doyoung had always lived up to her expectations. She didn’t have many for Doyoung and still, he managed to come up short in the end. It was disappointing.

Still, a part of Doyoung was relieved. He was relieved that the truth was out and he was relieved that Mark was okay. The baby had been born a few months early but she would survive.

Doyoung had a daughter, the new heir to the throne after him, and he would ensure she was rightfully treated. Even if he wasn’t married to Mark or properly mated, this child was Doyoung’s. No one could erase that or bury it. Doyoung wouldn’t allow it.

“I’m sorry for everything,” Doyoung offered, glancing up at her. She had a small smile but her eyes betrayed her. She was hurt. “If it could’ve been different—”

“It never would’ve been different,” she interrupted. Finally, she stood, smoothing down the skirt of her dress and giving a small curtsy. “It was a pleasure, Your Highness.”

She left without another word. Doyoung didn’t say anything and he didn’t follow her out. He didn’t even watch her leave. Instead, he turned to the window, looking outside. The sky was clear today, just the opposite of the heavy and dreadful feeling storming inside him.

Doyoung considered going to visit his brother but decided against it. He wasn’t sure how to face him when he was this way. He was caught in a limbo, between being wrong and being right. Doyoung had taken responsibility but he’d also caused the entire situation. He didn’t know whether he should pray for forgiveness or thank The Mother for giving him a child.

He hadn’t seen her. He hadn’t seen Mark either. He hadn’t been allowed to but Taeyong had promised he would take care of everything. Doyoung had made Taeyong swear nothing would happen to him and he trusted Taeyong to keep his word. It had been nearly a week since Mark had given birth.

According to Jungwoo, who Doyoung managed to catch earlier in the week, Mark was recovering well and he’d been able to hold and feed the baby. His body was weaker but within another week, he’d regain strength and be able to move around the room. The baby herself was fine. She was smaller than she was supposed to be and needed to be taken care of at all hours of the day. It frustrated Doyoung that he couldn’t be there but each time he had tried, he’d been denied.

The door opened again. “Doyoung,” Taeyong’s voice rang out, “Her Majesty requests to see you now.”

“Very well,” Doyoung answered, turning away from the window. “I’ll meet her.”

The walk to the audience room was quiet. Taeyong followed behind Doyoung, keeping his distance. More than disgusted, Taeyong was disappointed. He was hurt. Doyoung was supposed to trust Taeyong the most and he hadn’t. If there was anything Taeyong could’ve done, he would’ve done it without hesitation, even if it was wrong.

No maids were running around through the halls. It was eerily silent, only Doyoung and Taeyong’s footsteps on the hardwood floor echoing down the wide hallway. Perhaps Mother’s doing, Doyoung assumed, to keep any wandering eyes and whispering voices from overhearing and repeating anything.

They stopped in front of the large wooden doors and Taeyong stepped up, pushing the door open. Doyoung heard himself be announced by someone inside as he walked in. The older gentleman who’d announced his arrival stepped out the room, closing the door with a bow of his head. Doyoung looked towards his mother.

She was sitting in her chair as always, hands smoothing over her thighs, the paleness of her skin contrasting with the dark blue of her dress. She kept her hands on her knees as Doyoung approached her. He waited in front of her and she offered her hand. He took it gently and pressed a kiss to the back of it.

“Your Majesty,” he greeted.

“Sit down,” she said calmly.

Doyoung let go of her hand and took a seat in the armchair across from hers. He didn’t even dare breathe too loudly. Mother was deep in thought, her lips pinched and her gaze averted.

“Is it all true?” she finally asked. “Taeyong has never lied to me and I wouldn’t like to believe he decided to start now, with this.”

“It’s all true,” Doyoung managed to say. He took a shallow breath, in and out. “Taeyong didn’t lie to you.”

Mother stood from her chair and Doyoung copied her, holding his hands behind his back and dropping his head down to look at the floor. He heard her shoes against the thick carpet and after a moment, the hem of her dress came into view.

“A girl then?”

Doyoung looked up. The expression on Mother’s face was unreadable. “A girl,” he confirmed.

“This causes many issues, my dear,” she said, turning away from him and pacing across the room. “The Hado region is still under dispute, which is where he is from. He’s no one important to Hado and any claim he had to it was stripped away the moment he came here as a prisoner.”

“Mother, if I—”

“Doyoung, I need you to be honest,” Mother interrupted. There was a pause and Doyoung couldn’t tell what she would ask next. She didn’t sit down when she got to her chair. She turned to look at him, keeping her hands over her stomach. Her expression gave away nothing. “Why did you do this?”

Why? Doyoung didn’t know why. He had just done it. “I can’t truthfully answer that,” he replied. “There is no explanation for it.”

“You knew that you weren’t supposed to approach him after the first incident,” Mother said sharply. “So why did you?”

“I don’t know,” Doyoung said. He looked down at his hands, helpless. Could there be an explanation for this? Had Doyoung just lost control of himself and given in to Mark? “I didn’t seek him out on purpose at first.”

“You admit you sought him out then.”

Doyoung was growing increasingly frustrated. He balled his hands into fists and inhaled deeply. “Once or twice, I did. Any other time was not through me.”

“This entire time, you’ve been playing with him?” Mother asked. “You’re playing a dangerous game.”

“Does it matter?” Doyoung was held back by the look on his mother’s face and the strong smell of cinnamon. He couldn’t fight against her. He dropped his shoulders and sighed. “It was damned from the start.”

“For months, you kept this to yourself. I should punish you for this but She will take care of that when it’s your time.” Mother finally sat down, her dress puffing up around her legs. She smoothed the skirt out. “Sit.”

Doyoung did, keeping his hands on his lap.

“Do you love him?” Mother asked.

Love Mark? Doyoung had never felt romantic love towards anyone but he did want to be beside Mark, whether it was because of the bite that connected them or not. He’d been drawn to Mark from the start. Each time they had met, Doyoung had felt a certain bliss he was certain he’d never find anywhere else, and even if he had hated himself for feeling this way, he knew now that it wouldn’t go away.

Was that what it meant to love? Even if Mark was someone he wasn’t supposed to love, had Doyoung fallen into it anyway?

“Yes,” Doyoung said.

Doyoung had heard of destined mates through stories. He wondered if that was Mark. for him. All it took was one look, one single touch, and maybe Doyoung hadn’t been damned at all. 

“Well, you’ve done enough, Doyoung,” she said. “The only thing left to do is to make it right.”

The heaviness in his heart lifted.

* * *

She was a beautiful baby. In his arms, she was small but absolutely perfect. He had never loved someone more in his life.

He wondered if this was how Donghyun felt when he held his first and only child with Eunjoo. The lightness inside him was something he’d never felt before. He wanted to take care of her. He wanted to protect her from any harm in the world.

This was his daughter.

“Byul, you named her?” Doyoung asked, turning to look at Mark.

“I’m sorry I chose without you,” he murmured in response.

“I love it, don’t worry.” Doyoung brushed her cheek with the tip of his finger. She was healthier now but would still need to be taken care of. “It’s perfect. She’s perfect.”

Byul.

A star.

Doyoung knew that stars were something important to The Mother. Even when they died, they continued to burn brightly for years afterward. Stars were The Mother’s most precious creation. They were beautiful to admire but also completely untouchable. 

But here Doyoung was, holding one in his arms.

“Scars make the skin tougher,” Mark said suddenly. Doyoung turned to him and found Mark showing his palms. There were longer, larger scars across his skin there. “I’m not proud of the work I did before but I have my own as a result.”

“It’s okay then?” Doyoung asked. He got closer to Mark. “Will you?”

“In time,” Mark answered. He pulled the collar of his loose shirt down, revealing the scarred bite there. Doyoung held his breath. He met Doyoung’s eyes. “What do you think?”

“We have all the time in the world.” Doyoung knew that soon he and Mark would be together completely and absolutely. “She forgives,” he said, remembering the day in the chapel. “Then this cannot be so wrong?”

Mark shook his head, a small smile on his face. “Not all that is forbidden is meant to be so forever. With forgiveness of taking something like that, comes a special gift,” Mark murmured, looking at Byul in Doyoung’s arms. “To take care of Her most precious creation.”

Doyoung smiled down at her. Of course, he thought.

They’d been forgiven and given a chance to be better. This time, together.


End file.
